


The Line

by Bones (thepiesandthebees)



Series: In the Light of the End [2]
Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Star Wars Episode V: Empire Strikes Back
Genre: Cassian is your big brother who will watch Jyn fuck you up, F/M, Jyn isn't your mom friend but your big sister who will fuck you up, Pining, The many feelings of Cassian Andor, lots of pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-27
Updated: 2017-10-27
Packaged: 2019-01-25 01:43:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 23,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12520132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thepiesandthebees/pseuds/Bones
Summary: Jyn was warm, chasing away the cold that Hoth instilled. Cassian hesitantly wrapped his arms around her, but then held her tightly and pressed his face into her neck. She smelled of oil and resin. He breathed for what felt like the first time in weeks.“Welcome home,” she whispered into his temple, and he knew she wasn’t talking about Hoth.(Or Cassian and Jyn rescue Kes from prison.)





	1. Chapter 1

Leia and Han were bickering again. Jyn was sorely tempted to just smash their faces together and get all this pining done with, but they needed to sort that shit out for themselves. So Jyn just continued maintenance on her prosthetic leg in silence. The other rebels in the mess cast annoyed glances at Leia and Han while the pair argued about something that had happened on their last mission. Jyn wasn’t really listening. She had enough on her hands as it was. She didn’t need to know their business, too.

The cold of Hoth was good for her prosthesis. The amount of ice that crept into the casing was not. Water had a habit of messing with the delicate circuitry that allowed her to move her leg. She made a new casing for it a couple days ago that had kept all the moisture out, but there was still routine cleaning to be done from oil build up and general wear. Tingling from her artificial nerves ran up her leg every time she ran a pick through the hinge of her knee joint.

“Drying it out again?”

She looked up at Luke. He stood in his flight gear, having just returned from a routine patrol if she recalled his schedule correctly. Of the Trio, Jyn liked Luke the most. Han couldn’t give a straight answer to “What’s your favorite color?” And Leia was testier than a land mine. Luke had his moments, too, but for the most part, he was a calm, amiable guy who just wanted to make a difference. Jyn almost envied his naïveté at times. He hadn’t grown up in the Rebellion like most of the people here. His sheltered life on Tatooine, loved by his parents and away from the worst of the Empire, had made him soft and trusting. Jyn sometimes felt like his big sister because of it, even if she was only a couple years older.

She picked at a bit of gunk in her knee. “I’m just cleaning before we have to take off. My new case has worked so far.” She closed the panel over her knee and slid the translucent plate of her case back into place. It was a lightweight, water-proof polymer, similar to the material the stormtroopers used for their plating, but not as heavy or brittle. She could take a baton to her leg without so much as flinching.

Luke sat beside her at her table’s bench. “You’d think they would have sorted this out already,” he muttered, staring at Leia and Han as the two found a corner to yell at each other in.

Jyn shrugged. “It takes a brave person to fall in love. It’s insanity to fall in love in the middle of a war.” Her lips twitched when she thought of Chirrut and Baze. “Well, it’s not so bad being crazy.”

“Are you talking about yourself?” He had a wry grin.

She chuckled and ruffled his hair. “Careful there, Skywalker. Just because you destroyed the Death Star doesn’t mean you can sass your captain.”

He swatted her hands away, but his grin didn’t leave. “Yes, ma’am.”

Han growled in frustration, catching Jyn’s attention. “You are the most arrogant—”

Leia folded her arms over her chest. “You are insufferable—”

“Ungrateful—”

“Pigheaded—”

“Enough!” Jyn shouted, her voice echoing off the walls. She slammed her pick onto the table and stood.

Han and Leia turned to her slowly, but didn’t meet her eyes.

Jyn stared them down. “If you want to scream at each other, fine, but do it somewhere the rest of us don’t have to listen to you.”

“Han was—” Leia started.

“I don’t give a shit, Organa.” Jyn narrowed her eyes. “You of all people should know better. As part of the leadership, you are representing the Alliance. Is this really how you’re going to conduct yourself?” When Han chuckled, Jyn set her glare on him, shutting him up. “And you, Solo—I expected better of one of my pilots.”

He shifted his weight on his feet and crossed his arms, trying and failing not to look intimidated. Luke rubbed the back of his neck nervously. Leia worried her lip. The trio had a larger-than-life reputation after they’d effectively led the charge to destroy the Death Star, and few people dared to confront them. But Jyn had lost her leg and over half her team getting them the plans to destroy the Death Star, the plans her father had made. Then she’d dragged herself out of medical leave to help fight against the planet destroyer—with a barely functioning prosthesis, her right eye ruined, and her radiation burns still cracked and bleeding. The trio couldn’t say shit to her, and they knew it.

“Sorry, cap,” Han said stiffly, as if uttering the words physically pained him. “It won’t happen again.”

Jyn doubted that, but she took his apology with a curt nod. “Good.”

He sauntered out of the mess because Han never just walked—he _sauntered_. Leia headed for Luke and sat next to him with a heavy sigh. Jyn took her seat and opened the access panel on her ankle. She chose a smaller pick from the tool set she’d laid out on the table.

“Why is he always so difficult?” Leia muttered. “It’s like he thinks he’s still a smuggler. He has real responsibilities now.”

Jyn couldn’t help the huff of a chuckle that escaped her. “You’re going to have to give him time to get used to having people depend on him. It’s the first time others actually care about his opinion, and he’s getting that his decisions don’t just affect himself anymore. He’s feeling the pressure. Trust that he’ll rise to the occasion.”

Leia looked at her skeptically. “You sound really sure of that.”

“Well, I lived it.” Jyn picked out what looked like a bone fragment from her ankle and grimaced. Must have been from kicking that wampa two weeks ago.

“What do you mean you lived it?” Leia asked.

Jyn flexed her ankle. It still made a grinding sound. “I wasn’t always a captain with the Rebellion, Organa. I’m sure you’ve read my file.”

Leia shrugged. “Your file is classified. I’ve heard you were with Saw Gerrera at one point.”

“‘At one point,’” Jyn repeated with a bitter chuckle. “He raised me.”

Luke’s brows shot up. “So you grew up in the Rebellion?”

Jyn glanced askance at him. “I started when I was seven, left when I was sixteen, and…well…I was roped back in with the Death Star. Did some smuggling, arms trafficking, forgery, and odd jobs while I was on my own—lost count of how many prisons I’ve been in. It’s a different life, just being responsible for yourself, not giving a shit about anyone or the state of the galaxy. Solo’s trying, Organa, and he succeeds, for the most part. I’m not making excuses for him because he does need to get his act together, but he’s reliable when it counts and believes in the cause. He won’t leave so easy.”

Leia stared at her hands in her lap. “I guess.”

Luke clasped her shoulder. “He knew what he signed up for.”

“It’s just…” She sighed heavily. “I don’t know. I shouldn’t be talking about this now.”

Jyn flexed her ankle again. It moved smoothly. “Probably, but I promise I won’t tell anyone you actually have emotions.”

Leia finally cracked a smile. “Screw you, ma’am.”

Jyn pulled down her pant leg and put her pick back in the tool set. Leia and Han would be generals one day. She was certain of it. The two of them may have been young and immature now, but they were dedicated and charismatic in different ways. The hope they instilled in others made people want to rally behind them. Luke was similar, but he was destined for something else, possibly something greater. Jyn didn’t know it so much as _feel_ it. The three of them would do great things.

Luke’s head perked up just as Jyn’s did. Something was here. She’d learned to trust her senses more in the months since Scarif. Chirrut had commented that she was growing more in tune with the Force, aided by Luke’s presence. She didn’t know if that was true, but she had no reason to argue either, especially since her senses were never wrong.

Bodhi, covered in dirt and bruises, ran through the mess. She met him halfway. He chuckled when they wrapped their arms around each other.

“I thought you weren’t due back for another week,” she breathed in disbelief.

He squeezed her. “We finished early.”

Her nose scrunched up when the smell of oil and burnt ozone hit her. “You need a shower.”

He pulled away, a blinding smile on his face. “It’s good to see you, too.”

She couldn’t stop her own smile. It’d been nearly two months since she’d seen Bodhi. Their assignments rarely lined up so that they were back at base at the same time. The end of the Death Star hadn’t meant the end of the fight against the Empire. They both still had jobs to do.

“There’s someone else who just came in,” Bodhi said, mischief in his eyes. “He should still be in hangar three.”

Her legs moved of their own accord. She sped past Bodhi. His laughter sounded behind her.

#

Fatigue settled deep into Cassian’s bones—the ones he still had anyway. His prosthesis didn’t ache in the same way that the rest of him did, but he needed to do some maintenance on it. His elbow made a grinding sound when he pushed his metallic hand through his hair and let out a tired breath. His team looked just as tired. They shuffled out of the shuttle.

“Get some rest,” he told them while they headed out. “We leave at oh-four-hundred tomorrow.”

They grumbled in response. Other rebels in the hangar looked at the team sympathetically. Cassian slung his bag over his shoulder and headed out after them. He needed a shower, and then a month’s worth of sleep. He’d probably only get four hours, but a man could dream.

“Cassian!”

His feet stopped in their tracks. He’d barely turned around when a pair of arms pulled him in. For a moment, all he could do was stand there rigidly. No one had ever come to greet him after a mission before, certainly not like this.

Jyn was warm, chasing away the cold that Hoth instilled. Cassian hesitantly wrapped his arms around her, but then held her tightly and pressed his face into her neck. She smelled of oil and resin. He breathed for what felt like the first time in weeks.

“Welcome home,” she whispered into his temple, and he knew she wasn’t talking about Hoth.

His hands bunched in her jacket. “When did you get in?”

“A couple days ago.”

“So when do you leave?”

She didn’t answer immediately. “In four hours.”

His stomach sank. He held onto her tighter. They stayed like that for a minute until she pulled away, just enough to look up at him. A white glow shone in her right pupil briefly when she met his eyes. The blast on Scarif had damaged her eye irreparably. The Alliance had made her a new one, but the hazel iris wasn’t quite the right color and the artificial retina sometimes glinted in her pupil at certain angles. Skin grafts had lessened most of the damage done by the radiation burns on her face. Her lips didn’t pull up fully on the right side anymore, and a long indent ran from her ear to her chin where the grafts hadn’t healed correctly. But she was still the most beautiful woman he’d ever laid eyes on.

Her fingers grazed the bruise on his cheek. “What’s this?” she asked with a frown.

“I’m fine, Jyn.” He winced when she pushed on the discoloration.

“You’re full of it.”

He grabbed her wrist, but didn’t push her away. “We can’t fuss over every bruise and scrape.”

She sighed and dropped her hand to his shoulder. “It won’t be for lack of trying.” She glanced at his metallic arm. “Where’s your case?” When he didn’t answer, she narrowed her eyes. “Cassian.” Her tone was not kind.

“It might have been blown off,” he said reluctantly and prepared for her to scold him like she always did.

Her fingers ran over his prosthesis. “I left another in your room. It’ll keep out the snow.” She took his hand. There were dents in his fingers now. “Why do you make me worry so much?”

That wasn’t the reaction he’d expected.

“Ahem.”

They jumped and turned to see Chancellor Mon Mothma. Her white outfit nearly made her invisible against the ice-covered walls of the hangar. The auburn hair atop her head was the only bit of color on her.

“Forgive me for…intruding,” she said carefully, “but plans have changed. General Rieekan and I would like to speak with the both of you.”

Cassian grimaced. Jyn let out a tired breath. A change in plans meant some new danger had been discovered. They followed Mothma out of the hangar, through the icy halls, to the war room. Displays filled the space. Consoles lined the walls, manned by decoders and communications specialists. General Carlist Rieekan stood near the 3-D display, inspecting a star chart. His gray sideburns contrasted against a swath of brown hair atop his head. He was nearing sixty, but he still looked younger than fifty. His brown eyes flicked to Mothma when she walked in with Jyn and Cassian at her heels.

“Captain Andor, Captain Erso,” Rieekan greeted with a nod.

Jyn and Cassian saluted him. “General Rieekan,” they said in unison.

“My apologies for calling you in so suddenly, but we’ve just received something urgent.” Rieekan hit a button on the console. The display lit with the image of a space station and a mugshot of a human man.

“Kriff,” Jyn muttered. “That explains why he’s been out of communication.”

Cassian glanced at her. “He one of yours?”

“Yeah, Jurra pulled him from my team and sent him undercover to a base on Haidoral Prime about two weeks ago. He was supposed to report in yesterday. Kes is never late. I knew something was up.” She narrowed her eyes. “That looks like Hederat Prison, so the Empire isn’t who caught him—local government on Haidoral Prime probably.”

“The local authorities don’t know his real identity…yet,” Rieekan said. “If they find out, they’ll kill him. He has invaluable information from his time on Haidoral Prime. The two of you will need to extract him and bring him back safely.”

Jyn and Cassian exchanged a glance. He knew she was thinking the same thing as him.

“General, we don’t have the resources to launch an attack on a prison,” Jyn pointed out. “Are we to assume this is a stealth mission?”

Rieekan nodded. “Yes, both of you will need to go undercover without your teams. We cannot draw the Empire’s attention. There are few officers I would trust to do this, and you have both proven yourselves very capable with assignments like this.”

Jyn tapped the toe of her boot to the floor a few times. “Why are you sending me with Cassian? I’m a Pathfinder, and this is clearly a job for Intelligence.”

Mothma cast a withering glance at Jyn. “Because you’ve broken out of this prison before.”

When Cassian turned to Jyn in shock, she was staring at her feet. “That was dumb luck, and they’ve probably changed security protocols since I was last there.”

“Dumb luck? Three times?” Mothma arched a dubious brow.

Cassian blinked. “You broke out of the same prison three times?”

Jyn’s sigh was heavy and long. “It was dumb luck. I—” She abruptly stopped and folded her arms over her chest. “It’s not what you think.”

“Do you have something you need to say, Captain Erso?” Rieekan prompted, eyes narrowed in suspicion.

“The only reason I escaped was because of…a friend.” Jyn’s face fell. “They killed her while she was helping me escape the third time.”

Cassian got the sense this person had been more than a friend. He clasped her shoulder, making her look up at him finally. “I’m sorry, Jyn.”

She leaned toward him, seemingly involuntarily. Her eyes dropped when she laid her hand over his.

Rieekan cleared his throat. “My condolences, Erso, but it would be helpful if you explained how your…friend…helped you escape in the first place.”

Jyn took a moment, presumably to gather her thoughts. “She was a guard there. It’s privately owned, and they don’t mess with the Empire. Most guards there are ex-military or former mercs. Because the prison is floating between systems, they have biweekly supply ships come in. Eya…my friend—she would sneak me out of my cell during sleep hours and hide me on the outgoing ships.”

Mothma seemed to ponder the information a moment, lips pursed while her eyes scanned the display. “Perhaps if we got Captain Andor hired as a guard, and then you, Captain Erso, could return as a prisoner.”

“That could work,” Rieekan mumbled, tapping a finger on his chin. “I assume you didn’t get arrested under your real name, Erso.”

Jyn nodded. “I was using ‘Lyra Rallik’ at the time.”

“The docs will take some time to forge for you and Andor.”

“I can make them in three hours.”

Heads turned at that. Even Mothma seemed taken aback.

Jyn stared at the image of the prison—oblivious, or perhaps unconcerned, with the stares on her. “I’ll need access to any pictures we have of Cassian, but it shouldn’t take long.”

Cassian had known Jyn for almost a year now, and she still found ways to impress him. A corner of his lips twitched. “Show-off.”

She flashed him a wry smirk. “Try to keep up, Andor.”

“Who saved your ass on Malastare again?”

“The same man who nearly got us killed on Ithor.”

Rieekan leaned toward Mothma and whispered, “Are they fighting?”

She shook her head. “Don’t mind them. They do this.”

“I see,” Rieekan said and clasped his hands behind him. “Regardless, Captain Erso, do you know where the prison hires its guards?”

“Ord Mantell mostly. That’s where they hired Eya.” Jyn squeezed Cassian’s hand, which was still on her shoulder. “I have a contact there who might be able to get Cassian hired.”

Mothma stared at Jyn a long moment. “Reach out to them and keep me updated about the scandocs. In the meantime, you two should rest as much as you can.”

“But the plan—” Cassian started.

“The planning can be left to someone else, Andor. You need to sleep.” Mothma stood straighter. “You’ll leave at oh-six-hundred. Dismissed.”

Cassian and Jyn gave a salute before leaving the war room. They headed for the barracks on the other side of the base. A couple rebels passed them. The older ones gave polite smiles. The younger ones stared. Their reputation as the leaders of Rogue One often preceded them.

“How can you forge scandocs in three hours?” Cassian asked. “I find that hard to believe.”

Jyn chuckled. “I used to do it professionally. I got good at it.” She pushed his hair back from his face. “I wonder if I have a picture of you already, before you got scruffy.”

He glared at her without any real venom. “I didn’t get scruffy.”

“You’re right. You were always scruffy.”

He hip-checked her, making her laugh while she righted herself. He could listen to that laugh forever. They stopped in front of his door. He moved to go in, but she abruptly reached up and held his chin, making him freeze.

“They did a good job,” she mumbled. “There’s hardly any scarring left. No one would notice if I used an old picture probably.”

Without thinking, he swept his fingers over her brow, over the eye that she’d lost. “You still look beautiful.”

Pink touched her cheeks. She withdrew her hand. “Ah… Thanks.” She stepped out of his reach. “I’ll ping you when the docs are complete.” With that, she turned and headed down the hall.

Cassian waited until she’d disappeared around a corner to knock his head against his door.


	2. Chapter 2

_13 months ago…_

The hangar didn’t have many rebels in it. This station wasn’t large, used primarily as a pit stop between assignments. Jyn shuffled out of the shuttle with her team. The bag slung over her shoulder felt abnormally heavy, and the burn scars over the right side of her body ached. A hitch in her knee indicated she’d offset something in her prosthesis, probably from that ‘trooper who caught her with a truncheon. The rest of her team was in a similar state, bruised and tired. Captain Hayo was the last to leave the ship.

“Rest up!” he called behind them. “We leave in five hours!”

A woman greeted them at the gate and assigned them rooms. The station was currently empty enough that no one had to bunk up. It was a small blessing. Her team headed down a long hall, finding their respective rooms along the way.

“You all right, sarge?”

Jyn looked up at Kes. He was a quiet, but charming sort—older than her, yet lower in rank. That didn’t seem to bother him. If anything, he respected her. They’d already shared stories over drinks multiple times, and he’s showed her holos of his wife, a pilot with the Alliance. Jyn was already starting to think of him as a friend, which was dangerous in their line of business—not that she could help it.

“Just tired,” she assured him. “Nearly dying will do that.”

He arched a dubious brow. “Sure, but I think you’ve slept the least of any of us.”

She shrugged. “Someone’s gotta look out for your dumb asses.”

“I heard that!” Ivwin called behind them—a corporal like Kes with a penchant for diving into combat thoughtlessly.

“I was referring to you, Ivwin!” she called back.

Kes rolled his eyes. “Well, we’ll be heading back to Hoth soon enough.” He stopped at a door. “See you in five hours, ma’am.”

She grimaced. “Don’t call me ma’am. No one who’s seen me drunk can call me ma’am.”

He chuckled. “Erso, then?”

“That’s somehow worse.” She shook her head. “It’s just Jyn to you.”

“Then it’s just Kes to you.” He gave her a two-finger salute and headed into his room.

Jyn continued to the end of the hall. Her room was small, but packed with three bunk beds. She carelessly tossed her duffel on one and went straight to the message board built into the far wall.

 _Welcome, Sergeant Jyn Erso_ flashed on the screen when she tapped it. A series of messages lined up over it. The most recent one sat at the top. It was from Bodhi.

_Got back safely. Chirrut and Baze are here, too. They’re training new recruits. We all miss you._

Jyn smiled and wrote back a quick note, letting him know she’d return soon. The next message was from Unknown, but she knew who it was. As an Intelligence officer, Cassian wasn’t allowed to give his name on any communication platform, secure or not. She had the same restrictions as a Pathfinder within a covert ops group. It was fitting, considering her long history in covertly avoiding both the Rebellion and the Empire. That was probably why Mothma and Draven had put her here.

She tapped the message from Unknown.  _Just got sent out again. Should be back in two weeks. I left you some new schematics in your room and the weird wrench you wanted. If anyone asks, I didn’t give them to you._

She chuckled. Cassian’s and her prosthetics were technically Alliance property and not to be altered without mandate, but that never stopped her from tinkering. She was about to write a reply when she noticed the message was time stamped fifteen minutes ago from D Station. He was here.

Her legs moved before she could think about it. Hers was the only team using the sleeping quarters, so he had to be elsewhere on the station. She raced out of her room and headed down the hall for the common area. It was just a bar and a couple tables. Gray floors and gray walls provided little comfort. The only nice thing was the tall expanse of window showing a tiny moon they were orbiting. A couple people sat at the tables and fewer sat at the bar. Her eyes unerringly found Cassian. He was hunched over the bar, sipping something fizzy. His dark hair hung in his eyes.

She headed for the stool next to him. “Is this seat taken?”

He tensed in surprise, and then slowly turned to look at her. “Jyn.”

“Long time, no see.” She smiled. “It’s a good thing I got your message when I did.”

He stood and pulled her into a hug. She leaned into him readily. His metallic hand was cold at her back, but it was a comfort, how she knew it was really him. Her nightmares were always of before he lost his arm, before the Death Star destroyed Scarif.

“How long are you here?” she asked when he pulled away.

“About an hour.” When she sat on her stool, he did the same. “We’re just stopping to re-supply and then heading out again.”

She frowned. “Oh.”

“You should be resting.” He looked her over. “You look like hell.”

She punched his shoulder without any power. “I haven’t seen you in three weeks, and that’s what you say to me?”

He shrugged. “You need to sleep, Jyn.”

“I can sleep in an hour when you leave.” She waved over the bartender. “Right now, you’re going to buy me a drink and talk.”

He smile slowly, like he was trying to stop himself and failing. “Spice beer for the lady,” he said to the bartender.

She arched a brow. “How’d you know I like spice beer?”

“What kind of Intelligence officer would I be if I revealed my secrets?” He winked, and she pretended her cheeks didn’t warm.

The bartender brought a pint of spice beer and set it in front of Jyn. She held it up toward Cassian. “To happy coincidences.”

He tapped his glass to hers. “I’ll drink to that.”

#

_Present day…_

“It’s still too quiet without K,” Jyn mumbled from the co-pilot seat. She was happy to be back in Cassian’s ship, but it felt empty without K-2SO’s quips about her character and their impending doom.

Cassian sat in the pilot’s seat and started the engines, making the ship hum beneath them. “I used to complain about how noisy he was, but I didn’t know how much I’d miss it when he was gone.”

Jyn was about to reply when a knock came at the door. She and Cassian exchanged a glance before she got up to slide open the door. Shara stood beside the ship, the lines of her face harsh. Fire burned behind her brown eyes. Dirt smattered her tawny skin, indicating she’d just returned from a mission.

“You’re going to get my husband back,” she said—not a question, an order.

Jyn looked around the hangar at all the curious eyes on them. “How do you know about our mission? It’s classified.”

“Mothma doesn’t hide anything when it’s about Kes.” Shara took Jyn’s hand. “Promise me you’ll get him back. I…” Her lips pressed together. “Our child should have a father.”

“You… You’re…” Jyn glanced down at Shara’s stomach. “You’re pregnant.”

Shara nodded solemnly. “Yes, so you better bring Kes back home.”

Jyn clasped a hand over Shara’s. “It’s a promise.”

“Good.” Shara stepped back, releasing Jyn. “May the Force be with you, Captain Erso.”

Jyn inclined her head tersely before shutting the door again. A knot formed in her stomach when she sat down at the helm. Kes was going to be a father, and his life was in her hands. Force willing or no, she’d get him out of Hederat.

Cassian pulled the ship out of the hangar and into the harsh light of Hoth’s snow-filled day. The ride out of atmo was choppy from the harsh, freezing winds, but it smoothed out as soon as they were clear of the planet. Jyn already had their jump plotted before Cassian asked her to punch it. And then they were off, stars and planets blurring into light past the windshield.

“It’s good to be flying with you again,” Jyn mumbled. “It’s been too long.”

He had a sad smile. “It really has been.”

There was always an air of quiet sadness around Cassian ever since Scarif. The darkness that hung over him before came back in moments, but it had mostly been replaced with tired sighs and smiles that didn’t quite reach his eyes. They’d lost good people on Scarif. And maybe it had been worth it to destroy the Death Star. That didn’t make the sleepless nights any easier. Jyn still woke with the light of the Death Star’s blast burning her skin. She could still smell the water and sand under her knees. She still felt Cassian’s arms wrapped around her. And she still heard his shaky breaths against her ear while they held each other and waited for the end.

“So how do you know this contact on Ord Mantell?” Cassian asked after a moment of silence.

Jyn shrugged. “Met her while on another job. I forged her some scandocs that got her out of a pretty bad bind. She’s owed me one ever since.”

Cassian arched a brow. “It’s puzzling why Mothma put you with the Pathfinders, and not Intelligence.”

Jyn shook her head. “She’s got you. I’m better suited for beating people with truncheons…but covertly.”

“I recall. Pretty sure Jedha was the first time I—” He abruptly stopped. His lips pressed to a line.

Jyn’s brows knitted together. “Jedha was the first time you…?”

“The first time I thought you were competent,” Cassian finished weakly. It was probably a half-truth. He didn’t outright lie to her anymore, but he sometimes didn’t say all of what he meant, stopping himself like he just had.

Jyn leaned over. “Let me look at your arm.”

He didn’t resist when she pushed back his jacket. Her fingers were unnecessarily gentle in pulling his prosthesis from his sleeve. The translucent case she’d made for him already had scratches on the fingers from when he’d done some repairs on the ship. She carefully pried away the plates of it until all his machinery was exposed.

“I thought I heard your elbow grinding,” she muttered. “You didn’t clean it properly.” She took a tool roll from inside her jacket and unfurled it. Her pick of choice was long and slender with a tiny hook at the end.

Cassian relaxed into his chair while she scraped the gunk from his elbow joint. His artificial nerves made him twitch every so often from the sensation, but she knew it didn’t hurt. Pain wasn’t really an issue with prosthetics. They could tell when something was broken or damaged, but their brains didn’t register it as pain—maybe because damage to metal wasn’t life-threatening.

Ever since Scarif, Jyn did this for him. He tried to return the favor when he could, but she had high standards of cleanliness, too high for his abilities. So he tried to bring her back parts and schematics for upgrades when he could. Tinkering turned out to be something she enjoyed—probably something she got from her father. Engineering ran in the family, she guessed.

“Who was Eya to you really?” he asked, the question slipping out innocently enough.

She tensed for a heartbeat. “Eya was…” She resumed cleaning out his joint. “She was my last mistake.”

The cryptic answer seemed to make him more curious. “Who was your first?”

She didn’t answer immediately, thinking of soft brown curls and a warm smile. But then she mumbled, “A boy named Hadder Ponta. We were sixteen. He wanted to be a pilot with the Rebellion actually. I’d just left the Partisans, and he offered a real chance at something…normal.” She picked out a pebble from his elbow.

“What happened?” Cassian asked, but she suspected he knew how this story went. Most in the Rebellion tended to have several like it.

“Empire found me, and Hadder… His family…” She traded her pick for a smaller one. “I was young and careless, and it cost them their lives.”

He laid a hand over hers, making her pause. Neither of them spoke, just stared at each other in understanding.

She resumed picking at his joint after a moment. “Eya wasn’t like Hadder. We were close, but it wasn’t…” She shook her head. “Anyway, I met her on Ord Mantell during a smuggling job. She was a merc hired by one of my clients to protect the shipment. The prison was willing to pay her double what she was making, so she took the job there.” Jyn smiled with nostalgia. “When I ended up there, the first thing she told me was that she was not surprised at all to see me.”

Cassian chuckled. “Well, you have been to a lot of prisons.”

She pushed his shoulder. “Not that many.”

“More than one is too many, Jyn.”

She waved a hand dismissively. “I’m still here, aren’t I?”

His eyes were warm when he looked down at her. “That you are.”

Her heart fluttered, so she focused on his arm. After Hadder and Eya, her heart wasn’t allowed to flutter. “When we get to Ord Mantell, we’ll stay at an old Partisan hangout. It’s still run by a friend of Saw’s, so there shouldn’t be any issues. It should only take you a couple days to get hired. Once you leave for the prison, I’ll get arrested. We’ll have to play it by ear after that.”

“Wouldn’t be the first time…and probably not the last.” Cassian lifted his arm slightly when Jyn started working on his wrist, so she didn’t have to hunch over. “How do you know they’ll take you to the prison when you’re arrested?”

“Let’s just say I pissed off a lot of people on Ord Mantell who would love nothing more than to send me to Hederat.” She changed out her picks again before she got to work on his hand. “You’ll need to replace some of your phalanges soon.”

He arched a brow. “Do I? Or do you have a new hand for me in the works?”

Her lips twitched. “I suppose you’ll just have to find out when we get back.”

They chatted about nothing in particular while she cleaned his joints. The Rogue One team came up frequently. She kept tabs on Chirrut and Baze, even though they were off the grid most of the time. Last she heard, they were going to old sites of the Jedi Order to study and research what they could. Jyn imagined Chirrut would have made a great jedi. He planned to return to Hoth in a month’s time to train Luke in the way of the Whills. Jyn fully intended to get the same training.

Cassian had relaxed heavily into his seat by the time Jyn finished cleaning his joints. He could hardly keep his eyes open.

“You should sleep,” she said and pulled him to his feet. “It’s at least an hour until we get to Ord Mantell.”

A year ago, he might have argued, but he knew by now that she wouldn’t take no for an answer. “What about you?” he asked.

She shrugged. “I got a solid five hours.” She brushed his hair from his eyes. “But you didn’t.”

He stared down at her steadily. “How do you know?”

“You never sleep well right after a mission.” She took a step back before she acted on her urge to touch him more. “Go on.”

He hesitated before padding to the cots at the back of the ship. She sat in his chair when he flopped down, his eyes closing immediately. It was rare that he fell asleep so easily. He must have been exhausted. If she recalled correctly, his last mission had been a month-long undercover operation at an Imperial base in the Core. That couldn’t have been easy.

She smiled when she heard his breathing even out. It melded into the soft rumble of the engines. “Welcome home,” he’d told her after he’d rallied their team to head to Scarif. It was the first time she’d heard those words since Hadder. At first, she thought Cassian had found her a home with the Rebellion, but it never felt like it until he returned to her. Home never had been a place.

#

The light was blinding. It moved quickly over the water, seconds away from taking them. He held her closely as she did the same. The smell of burnt ozone and blood clung to them, mixing with the salty scent of the water and sand. His eyes squeezed shut. Heat overcame him, burning his flesh. And he held tighter.

“Cassian!”

His eyes snapped open to see a pair of hazel irises hovering over him. The air burned in his lungs. He heard his heartbeat in his ears. “Jyn,” he breathed, voice breaking on her name, and reached up to cradle her face in his hands. She was alive.

She pressed her forehead to his and whispered, “I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere.”

He closed his eyes and breathed in the scent of oil and resin. They stayed like that for a long minute until his heart rate slowed to a normal pace, but even then, neither of them moved to pull away.

“I was getting better,” he mumbled when he felt strong enough to use his voice.

She ran a hand through his hair. “You can’t rush these things.”

He knew that friends didn’t really do this for each other, but didn’t want to part from her just yet. They had nightmares, as almost all soldiers did. It was harder when he was away from her, and he could only imagine her warmth and the gentle brush of her fingers. Her nightmares were quieter than his. She usually woke trembling and didn’t stop until his arms were around her. They never did this in front of their teams, but in private, no one could interrupt or judge this ritual they’d developed over the past year.

The navigation panel beeped to let them know they were about to drop out of hyperspace. Jyn reluctantly pulled away. When Cassian opened his eyes again, she leaned in to kiss his forehead. “I’ll bring us in,” she whispered into his skin. “Take a couple minutes.” And then her warmth vanished. She headed back to the helm and sat down to take control just before they decelerated. Ord Mantell was a blue dot in the distance.

Cassian did as told and took a couple minutes to breathe before getting up. He went to the weapons rack on the wall and holstered several knives at his belt, along with a blaster at his hip, and a utility knife at his ankle. Ord Mantell filled the windscreen by the time he took a seat at the helm. Jyn brought them down to Worlport. The capital city stretched like a web across the Coral Coast. Multi-colored domes shone in the sunlight. A maze of roads connected the smattering of districts. The city walls hadn’t been repaired in decades, and it showed.

Morro Spaceport sat in the heart of the capital. A flurry of ships came and went. Jyn gave out their falsified information to flight command and proceeded to the docking bay they indicated. As soon as they were on the ground, Jyn shut off the engines and went to the back to gear up. Cassian could help but stare at her while she stashed an inordinate amount of knives, a truncheon, and a blaster on her person. She caught him.

“What?” she asked, looking herself over. “Did I forget something?”

He shook his head and stood. “No.”

She grabbed her bag from a rack and tossed him his own. “Then let’s get going, Mister Carida.”

He blinked, a feeling of deja vu running through him. Had she called him that before? “Yeah… Let’s go.”

“You all right?” She had honest concern in her eyes now. “If you need another minute—”

“No, no, I’m fine.” He offered as reassuring a smile as he could manage.

Her eyes were soft. “All right. Follow me.”


	3. Chapter 3

“Never thought I’d see you back here, Rallik,” Merhish grumbled. “Got some new scars…and limbs.”

Jyn folded her arms over her chest and leaned against the wall of the Red Mountain Pub. Crowds of people strolled through the street, caught up in their own business. The smell of acid rain clung to the ground. Oil runoff sat in puddles on the street. Voices at varying levels filled the air, ensuring no one would be listening to Jyn and Merhish.

“Can you get my friend in or not, Merhish?” Jyn asked, ignoring the woman’s comments.

Merhish sighed and pushed a hand through her tight, red curls. Freckles covered her fair skin. She’d been a recruiter last Jyn had been here. Now she ran her own agency, but her beginnings in the underworld showed in the ease she had standing in the middle of this seedy neighborhood.

“Yeah, I can get him hired,” she said. “Send me his info. I’ll have him working by tomorrow afternoon.” She narrowed her eyes. “You better watch yourself here, though. Vara’s been itching to send you back to Hederat since you last escaped.”

Jyn nodded. “Thanks, Merhish. I’ll send you Willix’s info.”

“I hope never to hear from you again.” Merhish walked away, hands stuffed in her pockets and head down. She soon disappeared in the crowds.

Jyn went back into the pub. Aliens of all species filled the space. Some obscure band played a moderate tune in a corner. The smell of alcohol hung heavy in the air. Cassian sat at the bar, nursing some purple drink. Jyn sat beside him and ordered a spice beer.

“Merhish says she’ll have you working by tomorrow afternoon,” she said when the bartender pushed a pint toward her.

Cassian sipped his drink. “She works fast.”

“She always has.” Jyn took a sip of her spice beer. It tasted like cinnamon gasoline, but it was alcohol. “Dihedi give us a room upstairs?”

He hesitated before taking another sip from his beer. “She did. It’s only got one bed. She said that’s all that was available.”

Jyn looked down the bar at the Ithorian woman who owned the place. Dihedi waved at her. “She’s lying, but we can’t very well deny her hospitality. She’s letting us stay for free, and our drinks are on the house.”

Cassian sighed. “It doesn’t matter. We have to sleep in shifts anyway.”

“You should take first watch, so you can get sleep right before you have to leave.” Jyn grimaced when she thought about all the work ahead. It’d be easy enough to get arrested and sent to Hederat. Everything after would be hell.

Cassian took her hand over the bar, interrupting her thoughts. “How about we stop talking about work for the rest of the night?”

She looked up at him, and her lips pulled into a smile of their own volition. “I think I can manage that.”

“Good.” He held up his glass, and she tapped hers to it.

Neither of them drank much at all, not enough to start a buzz. They were still on the job and had to be sharp. The bartender didn’t charge them for their drinks, and no one paid them any mind when they finally went upstairs to the tiny room Dihedi had given them. Jyn took off her jacket and boots, followed by most of her knives, before sitting on the bed, but she kept her blaster on the nightstand next to her. Cassian sat on the other side of the bed and faced the window. It looked out to the wall of the neighboring building. The sounds of the city were only slightly softer here. Sirens and voices and who knows what else still hummed in the night air.

“I could get Dameron out myself,” Cassian said suddenly. “You don’t have to come with me.”

Jyn stared at him a moment, trying to figure out just what he was thinking. “You won’t be able to defend Kes from other guards or prisoners like I will. We can’t let him get killed before we even get the chance to save him.”

Cassian didn’t reply immediately. “Bey and Dameron are married.”

“They are.” Jyn narrowed her eyes. “What’s wrong, Cassian? You’re being odd.”

He shook his head. “It’s nothing. Just…thinking.”

She leaned over and pulled his shoulder until he looked at her. “You know you can tell me about anything, right?”

A smile touched his lips, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “I know.” He turned away again. “You should get some sleep.”

She got the sense that something was wrong, but didn’t want to push him. He’d tell her on his own time. She lay back on the bed and closed her eyes.

#

_5 months ago…_

Cassian had seen the holos and read all the reports. Captain Hoya and Sergeant Erso had a disagreement about which route to take during a covert strike on an Imperial station. Hoya went through with his plan, believing his route faster, but on the way, his team had been discovered. He’d been killed in combat, along with three others, before Jyn pulled everyone back. As second-in-command, she became acting captain. The remainder of her team rallied behind her and successfully took down the station, but she’d lost two more people. No one had expected her to complete the mission after Hoya died, let alone bring back ten of her team. Rieekan had already submitted her name to promote her to captain. Cassian doubted she was happy about it.

The doctor passed him on his way to the waiting room of Hoth’s med bay. Based on her grave expression, the news she’d delivered hadn’t been good. Kriff. Cassian stepped into the bleak, white room. Chairs lined the walls. There was only one other person inside.

She sat hunched over, hands clasped behind her neck like she was trying to drown herself. Cassian wasn’t sure what to do, so he just stared helplessly. Her knuckles had scabbed over for the most part. Dirt and blood still clung to her fatigues. The ponytail she always sported was gone, letting her hair spill over her shoulders messily. She hadn’t left here in the four hours since she’d returned.

Chirrut stepped into the room with Baze at his heels. His unseeing eyes stared into nothing, but Cassian got the sense Chirrut knew exactly who was here.

“Jyn,” Baze said gently, “there’s nothing you could have done.”

She didn’t move. “I lost seven.” The tightness in her voice unnerved Cassian. “They just told me Ivwin didn’t make it. I lost…seven.”

Chirrut tilted his head. “You’re the reason the other nine made it.”

She didn’t respond.

“The Force—”

“Stop.” She dropped her hands and turned to look at him. Fury burned in her eyes. “Don’t even go there.”

Chirrut seemed unfazed. “You did the best you could, Jyn—better than anyone thought possible in the circumstances. You deserve the promotion.”

She looked down at the floor again. “If this is how I get promoted, I don’t want it.”

“You saved nine people,” Baze said. “This is deserving of acknowledgement.”

“Tell that to the families of the seven who didn’t make it.”

Cassian had to do something. He couldn’t stand to see her like this. “Jyn.” When she looked up at him, he came closer and crouched before her, so their eyes were level. “I’m sorry.”

Her lips pressed together, and tears glimmered in her eyes. “He didn’t make it. I brought him back, and he still didn’t make it.”

“I’m sorry,” Cassian repeated, meaning it. He had lost so many and gotten medals after watching the people they left behind mourn. No amount of arguing would ever convince him that he’d done enough for the fallen. They were gone, and he was commended. So he was sorry—sorry that he wasn’t good enough, sorry she carried that with her now, sorry they had lost good people.

She dropped her head to his shoulder. He tensed, not expecting her reaction, but then relaxed and wrapped his arms around her. She let out a shaky breath. Her hands rested on his chest, but then bunched in the fabric of his shirt.

“I lost them,” she rasped. “I lost them.”

He held her tighter. “I’m sorry.”

She pressed closer to him and cried.

#

_Present day…_

Merhish’s promise was good. By mid-morning, she sent Jyn a confirmation that Willix Carida had earned position as a guard at Hederat Prison. And by the afternoon, Cassian was on a shuttle to Hederat Prison with three others. He didn’t speak from his seat in the wall, didn’t want to be friendly with people he might have to kill later. They seemed content to give him the same treatment.

His mind wandered to Jyn, as it usually did. No matter how much he resisted thinking of her, he couldn’t stop himself. They hadn’t been put on a mission together in seven months, and in the time since then, they’d seen each other maybe four times. Rebel stations across the galaxy had message boards where anyone could securely send a message to another officer at any station. His chest always warmed whenever he saw that she’d left a message for him. And that was a dangerous game to play in their fields.

Kes and Shara may have been married, but they had different circumstances. Even though Kes was a Pathfinder like Jyn, he wasn’t Captain Jyn Erso—fabled war hero of Rogue One and fearless leader. The Empire wanted her dead. And Cassian was not only wanted for his part in Rogue One, he was also Intelligence. More than once, the Empire had captured and tortured him for what he knew. He would always be hunted, as would Jyn. She knew that as well as him. There was a line neither of them could ever cross. But they got close. So very, very close.

The shuttle landed, and a pair of men in black armor ushered him out with the new guards. Cassian kept his head down and followed the men through the hangar. This place looked well-funded. Everything was clean and top of the line. The guards along the walls had blasters from this standard year. Their armor was well-maintained, but did have scratches from use. The inside of the hangar didn’t have a speck of dust. In all likeliness, the prisoners were tasked with cleaning the station to save on a cleaning crew.

The guards led Cassian and the new hires through a door at the back and down a long hallway. One pointed out the locker rooms, the refresher, and then the living quarters at the end. The other told them to wait until Viuss came by to give them a proper tour of the prison, and then the escorts left. Cassian stood with his future colleagues in a room filled with bunks. A glance at a doorway to an adjacent room revealed more bunks. There had to be almost a hundred guards here.

“How’d you lose your arm?”

Cassian turned to look at a woman. She seemed to be around his age with dark freckles and barely lighter skin. Her hair was tied back tightly. The straight-backed way she held herself and the scars over her forearms indicated a long history in combat.

“I got shot,” Cassian answered truthfully.

She nodded, as if she’d expected the response. “I’ve never seen a case like that. You make it yourself?”

“A friend of mine did. She’s got a mind for those things. I’m more of a ‘point and shoot’ person.” His eyes scanned the bunks. They didn’t look to be terrible—certainly better than the average accommodations.

The woman extended a hand. “I’m Zahil.”

“Willix,” he said automatically and shook her offer.

The other hires seemed to feel comfortable enough then to introduce themselves as well. Cassian didn’t really pay attention. He wasn’t here to make friends. They wanted to chat a little, so he acted as friendly as needed to appear normal and no more. Eventually, another guard came to give them a tour. Cassian paid attention then.

Hederat Prison was fairly small as far as prisons went. There was the main block that held almost five hundred prisoners, and then another block for those in solitary confinement. Cassian walked past rows and rows of cells, trailing at the back of the group. There were twenty levels winding around open space. The bottommost level had a yard of sorts, but apparently it wasn’t used that often.

“Prisoner work shifts are sixteen hours long with two breaks for lunch and dinner,” the guiding guard explained. “Guard shifts are ten hours with two, hour-long meal breaks. You’ll get two fifteen minute breaks in between those. Your breakfast time is determined by which shift you get. Morning shift gets breakfast at five. Noon shift gets breakfast at eleven. Night shift gets breakfast at seventeen.”

Cassian stared at the empty cells they passed, noting four bunks in each. Kes could be anywhere on this blighted thing, and it’d take forever to figure out where he was without getting into the prisoner database, which he doubted he’d get access to easily. Jyn would probably have an easier time since she could just ask other prisoners until she found him. She had to find Cassian, too, though.

The guide brought their group to an empty cafeteria. “This is the cafeteria for the guards. The prisoner cafeteria is on the other side of the station.” She led them through a door on the far wall that opened to a short hallway. They turned through another door and stopped in what appeared to be a control room of sorts. Consoles lined the walls, manned by droids. A window looked out over a set of machines. People in blue jumpsuits worked them, apparently making machine parts.

“This is the shop,” the guide said. “A third of the prisoners are assigned here. They make parts for all kinds of things, but mostly aerospace. Another third of the prisoners are assigned to inspection and packaging. The final third are assigned to sanitation.”

So that’s how the prison was so wealthy. It was a massive machine shop. Parts had to go out at least a couple times a week, so maybe they wouldn’t have to rely on a biweekly supply ship to get off the station.

“Any questions so far?” the guide asked.

Cassian looked around. “What room is this?”

“Main control. All the doors and locks in the station are directed from here. Our droids manage everything. Doors open for shift start, end, and lunch. They’re closed and locked all other times.” The guide tapped the keycard at her hip. “Senior guards can get in and out if needed. In case of an emergency, such as a fire, all the doors will unlock.”

There had to be prisoner records here as well in order to move, transfer, and assign prisoners to cells. Cassian could hack into the database, but he had to figure out how to get past the security first. There were cameras and guards everywhere. The droids probably didn’t allow just anyone to go through the records either. Hacking had to be a last resort. He’d just have to place his faith in Jyn, which wasn’t difficult. She’d exceeded his expectations from the day they’d met and every day after.

“Any other questions?” the guide prompted.

He eyed her key card. “No, ma’am.”

#

Getting arrested was as easy as Jyn remembered. All she had to do was barge into the apartment of Vara P’gerir, leader of the local Black Sun chapter, and within four hours, she was on her way to Hederat. Vara had lots of friends in Hederat who would love nothing more than to beat the shit out of Jyn—or rather, Lyra Rallik. The Black Sun had hated Miss Rallik since she’d assassinated Vara’s old boss who was colluding with the Empire. Vara had inherited the position, but Old Timbian had been a respected crime lord. So Lyra Rallik was on their blacklist. Thankfully, they had a “suffer first” policy, which stated that Miss Rallik would be tortured and maimed horribly before being killed. Jyn hoped that would be harder in practice than in theory. Somehow, she knew she was going to get the shit kicked out of her. Kes would owe her his firstborn for this—or at the very least, she’d get to choose the kid’s name.

The shuttle landed in the south hangar. They’d improved it since Jyn had been here last. Guards led her and a procession of prisoners in chains to stretch of hallway. She was let out of her chains only to be pushed into a refresher with the other prisoners. The guards had them all strip down and stand under sonics. Jyn probably should have felt embarrassed or violated or something other than passive, but this was routine to her. She dressed in the blue jumpsuit the guards tossed her as soon as the sonics shut off.

The prisoners were directed into the cell block and divided across the third level. Jyn ended up being shoved into a cell with an Elomin woman and a Ranat woman. They didn’t pay her much mind, just laid in their bunks and stared up. The Elomin was on the top, and the Ranat the bottom, leaving Jyn to choose whichever spot she wanted from the beds on the opposite wall. She sat on the bottom bunk and stared at her hands. The guards said breakfast was in thirty minutes, so she just had to bide her time until then.

“How’d you lose your leg?”

She looked up at the Elomin woman who stared back with black eyes. “I got shot,” she answered truthfully.

The Elomin rested her chin on her arms over the bunk’s railing. “Your eye get shot out, too?”

“No, it was burned.” Jyn looked the Elomin over. “I’m Lyra.”

“Jurreyinstak, but you can call me Jurrey. That down there is Vee.” Jurrey pointed at the Ranat who just grunted in response. “Vee doesn’t talk much.”

Jyn offered a curt nod. “How long have you been here?”

“About two years for me. Vee won’t tell me how long she’s been here.” Jurrey hopped down from her bunk with impossible grace. She landed near silently on her feet. “Something tells me this isn’t the first time you’ve been in a cell, so I think you’ll be fine. Just don’t tick off the Trandoshans.”

Jyn pushed a hand through her hair. “Will do.” She glanced out the cell door at all the others. “You wouldn’t happen to know an Imbis Tariday, would you?”

Jurrey frowned. “Why? Do you?”

Jyn sensed something was off. “Friend of mine. Heard he landed in here.”

“You got a crazy kriffing friend. He pissed off Kakere, one of those Trandoshans I mentioned. I’m surprised he hasn’t been killed yet.”

“Son of a bitch.” Jyn sighed heavily. Imbis Tariday was Kes’ alias, an alias that was not supposed to have a reputation within two weeks of landing in kriffing Hederat Prison. She was going to murder that man when they got out of here.

Jurrey stretched her arms over her head. “I give him three days max.”

Not if Jyn had anything to say about it. She lay back in her bed that smelled vaguely of blood and oil. Jurrey seemed content to cease conversation, going through a series of complicated stretches that seemed to be part of her morning routine. Vee just stared up at the ceiling and didn’t move.

A buzzer rang out eventually, and the cell door slid open, signifying the beginning of breakfast. Jyn shuffled out with the rest of the prisoners to funnel downstairs into a massive cafeteria. They’d automated everything since she’d been there and added another food line. She kept her head down, grabbed a tray and spoon, and stood in the back of a line. A droid eventually dumped gray nutrient paste on her tray. She looked around the cafeteria, searching for Kes. Knowing him, he’d probably stuffed himself into a corner where he could observe the majority of the room. She headed to the back of the cafeteria, mindful not to run into anyone. Her eyes caught a swath of dark hair against the far wall.

Kes sat at a table by his lonesome, leisurely eating his nutrient paste. Bruises shone through his olive skin. He sported an impressive black eye. So naturally, Jyn marched up to him and smacked the back of his head.

“You look like a wampa’s ass,” she muttered.

He tensed and slowly turned to look up at her. His eyes widened. “You… How did you get here?”

She sat next to him. “Same as you. Got arrested.”

He glanced around the table uneasily. The other prisoners weren’t paying them much attention. “Did Rieekan send you?” he whispered.

“Better make it worth it.” She ate a spoonful of her paste. It tasted of regret. “I hear a lot of people want to know what’s in that stupid head of yours.”

He ate his paste. “It’s good to see you, Jyn.”

“It’s ‘Lyra’ while we’re here.” Jyn rolled her shoulders and looked around the cafeteria. “You don’t get to die in this place.”

“I can’t promise that I—”

“Shara’s pregnant.” Jyn narrowed her eyes at him. “So you don’t get to die here. Do I make myself clear?”

His eyes were wide. “Shara is… I…” He took a breath. “You’re clear, ma’am.”

Satisfied, Jyn scooped another spoonful of paste. “Good.” She ate it with a grimace. “And don’t call me ma’am.”


	4. Chapter 4

Jyn’s idea of making it easy for Cassian to find her was beating the shit out of a Wiphid and then stabbing a spoon into a Trandoshan’s eye for, quote, “Looking at me with your beady, kriffing lizard eyes.” All guards near the cafeteria were called in to defuse the situation. Cassian was both exasperated and completely enamored with this insane woman. He failed not to smile underneath his helmet while he literally lifted her off the Trandoshan and threw her to the ground.

“Do you enjoy making everything hard?” he whispered as he wrestled her hands behind her back.

She chuckled and spit blood onto the floor. “Just for you, Cassian.” Her wink gave him…feelings. Hard, pulsing…feelings.

Kes stood off to the side with the other prisoners, keeping his head down, but his eyes were trained on Jyn. A senior guard ordered Cassian to take Jyn to the containment room. He pulled her to her feet and pushed her between prisoners. She spit blood on a man as she passed by.

“Good to see you again, Yfero,” she taunted.

Cassian kept pushing her forward, but she pushed back.

“The Black Sun can eat my ass!” she called over her shoulder. “I’ll take on all of you! Vara was a shitty lay!”

“I’m so close to blowing you out the airlock,” Cassian whispered as he pushed her out of the cafeteria.

She flashed him a grin that absolutely did not make his heart stutter multiple times. “Just try it.”

He brought her through the cell block to the containment room—a concrete chamber used to hold unruly prisoners indefinitely. “What the hell was that back there?” Cassian demanded. “‘Vara was a shitty lay’? Who’s Vara? What does that have to do with the Black Sun?”

“Vara’s the leader of the Black Sun in Worlport.” Jyn sank back against a wall, breathing heavily. Her lip was split, and she had a bruise forming on her cheek. “A couple years ago, I slept with her to get to her boss and assassinate him.”

Cassian blinked. “You… No, I don’t want to know.” He shook his head. “Why were you challenging the Black Sun like that? Are you trying to get yourself killed?”

Blood dripped from a cut in her brow, forcing her to close her eye. “The Black Sun has been out for me since I killed their boss. They had their eyes on Kes because he got into it with the Trandoshan I stabbed. She won’t be looking at him now.”

“Because you stabbed her _in the eye_.” Cassian wiped the blood from her brow. “I know we’re here to save Dameron, but you making yourself a target in his stead wasn’t part of the plan.”

“Plans change. We should know that better than anyone.” She lifted her hands from behind her back, cuffs hanging off one wrist. “You were really rough back there.” She pulled his helmet off.

He was definitely not impressed or turned on because she escaped her cuffs so casually. “I had to make it look real,” he mumbled.

“Uh-huh.” She dropped his helmet to the floor with a wry grin. “Well, you should know that Kes is in cell five-dash-three-nine, and I am in three-dash-eight-six.”

The beeps of the door panel took Cassian’s attention.

“This is for throwing me.”

That was all the warning he got before she tackled him to the ground and pulled his arm behind his back. The door opened, and two guards rushed to pull Jyn off him. He scrambled to his feet as soon as he could and glared at her. The smug grin on her face was simultaneously infuriating and hot all at once. The guards had her pinned against the wall, but she seemed entirely unconcerned.

“Get back to your post, rookie,” one of the guards said. “We’ll take her to medical.”

Cassian picked up his helmet and put it on again. Jyn ran her tongue over the split in her lip, and he moved a little faster to leave. They had to get out before she made him implode.

#

After the doctor patched Jyn up, she was assigned to the machines. It was near deafening in the shop, so they gave her a pair of ear plugs. One of the foremen tried to train her on the machine they put her on, but he quickly figured out that she already knew how to use it and left her to her own devices. Nothing much had changed since she was last here. There were more machines, but they were more of the same. The prisoners still gave her a wide berth, especially after breakfast. Stabbing Trandoshans in the eye tended to make people scared.

She focused on her work and didn’t talk to anyone. No one tried to start anything with her until lunch came around. Yfero, a former smuggler for the Black Sun, stormed up to her and smacked her tray out of her hand. There was no paste on it yet, so she really didn’t see the point. He seemed adamant about his choice, however.

“That shit you pulled earlier better not happen again, Rallik,” he growled. “We have people everywhere, and we will—”

She stepped closer, so she was in his face. “You’ll what? Torture me? Murder me? Timbian said the same thing before I had his fat throat in my hands.” She ducked his swing and swept his legs out from under him, sending him into the floor.

“You crazy bitch!” Yfero got to his feet while she stared down at him calmly.

A pair of guards hurried over and pulled Jyn’s arms behind her back. “This is your second offense, Rallik,” one said. “Five days in solitary.”

Jyn didn’t resist while they pushed her out of the cafeteria to the solitary block. The doors here didn’t have bars. They were solid, sound-proof metal. The guards threw Jyn in one, but they didn’t leave. One held her up while the other slammed a fist into her gut. The air rushed out of her as she buckled over. They held her up and continued beating her until she was dizzy with the pain. It seemed an eternity until they let her go. She sank to the ground and coughed up blood.

“For Timbian,” a guard said. They left without another word. So some guards were also part of the Black Sun. Fantastic.

She spit a stream of red and tried to breathe normally. They’d probably broken some ribs. She slowly sat against the wall, ignoring the twinge in her gut and the ache in her jaw. She wiped the blood from her mouth with her sleeve.

The room was plain concrete. A mattress sat on the floor next to a toilet. Five days here wouldn’t be so bad, assuming no more guards came to beat her. They probably would, though. Hopefully Kes would keep his head down and avoid trouble while she was away.

The door opened. Jyn tensed. A guard stepped in with a med kit. He knelt by her and pulled a tube of bacta gel from the kit. She tried to take his helmet off, but as soon as she pulled, her ribs seized up. A gasp escaped her.

“Easy,” Cassian breathed and took off his helmet. “It’s me.”

She smiled as best she could. “I know.”

He handed her the bacta gel and took out a roll of bandages. She unzipped her jumpsuit, revealing a smattering of dark splotches across her stomach and chest. Abrasions bled through her bra and stained the underside of her jumpsuit.

“Kriff,” Cassian muttered.

Jyn smeared the bacta over her skin. “How did you know to bring me med supplies?”

“I heard a couple guards talking about beating you for Timbian. There’s quite a few of them with the Black Sun.” He took the gel from her when she couldn’t reach a spot on her back. His touch was gentle on her skin, despite the calluses on his hands.

She rested her head against the wall. “Intelligence officer indeed.”

He smoothed his fingers down her back, earning a shiver. “There are shipments that go out every other day to Ord Mantell. As soon as you’re out of solitary, I can sneak you and Dameron out. Shipments leave just before breakfast. I’ve memorized the nightly patrol routes, but we’ll have to get the timing just right.”

“Nothing new.” Jyn caught his hand before he withdrew it. “Thank you, Cassian.”

His smile was strained. “Of course.” He took a bit of bacta gel on his thumb and smoothed it over the cut on her bottom lip.

Her heart beat too hard in her chest. She pulled him closer until their foreheads touched. “Stay safe out there.”

“That’s my line.” He cupped her cheek.

They were so close. Always so close.

Jyn turned her face away. “You should go before they notice you’re gone.”

“Right.” Cassian put his helmet back on and gathered up the med supplies. “I’ll try to come back later.”

She nodded and zipped up her jumpsuit. He left without another word.

#

_3 months ago…_

As a captain in a special forces covert ops unit, Jyn had some…advantages. Mostly, she could look up classified information under the guise of mission research, and more often than not, her “research” took her to Cassian’s assignments. He admitted to doing the same for her since their resources were virtually the same, so she didn’t feel too guilty about abusing her power.

Cassian had been undercover for almost a month on Chandrila, gaining the trust of an Imperial kyber research team, but it had all gone south when a group of rebel extremists attacked the facility and killed almost everyone. The datapad shook in Jyn’s hands. The vid showed Cassian backed against a wall, half his prosthesis gone, while rebels encroached on him. One let out a shot. It caught him in the chest, and he crumpled to the ground. The feed cut out shortly after.

She tossed the datapad onto her bed and took a shaky breath. Panic threatened to undo her, but she pushed it down. “Captain Erso,” Mothma’s voice said through her comm.

Jyn unclipped it from her belt, nearly fumbling with it because her hands wouldn’t stop shaking. “Yes, Chancellor?” Her voice was steadier than it should have been.

Mothma didn’t speak immediately. “Rieekan noticed you looked at Andor’s mission logs just now.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Jyn took a breath. “Is that a problem?”

“His ship will be coming in momentarily. He’s stable for now. The shot missed his heart.”

Relief rushed through Jyn. “That’s very good.”

“It is.” Mothma paused a long moment. “I don’t know if Andor will be in before you leave, but I felt you should know he’s doing all right. I know you’re good friends.”

“Thank you, ma’am.” Jyn sank down on her bed with a sigh. In an hour, she would take her team to intercept and destroy a cargo ship filled with Imperial arms before it reached Coruscant. That was an hour to get her mind clear, so she could focus on the mission.

Her team was already out in the hangar when she composed herself enough to leave her room. They were packing up the ship and doing last minute repairs. She joined them, getting lost in the work, instead of thinking about Cassian. He had to be all right.

With six minutes left until their departure time, Cassian’s ship flew in. Two of his team carried him out on a stretcher and rushed him to the med bay. Jyn watched him go from the door of her shuttle. They had to leave soon. She couldn’t go see him.

“We’ve got this, cap,” Kes said from behind her.

She turned to see him and her team gearing up. “What?”

He offered a small smile. “We’ve got this. Go see Andor.”

Her team gave her affirmative nods. She looked around at them, chest warming. “I’ll be right back.” She hurried out of the hangar and went straight for the med bay. The doctor didn’t even ask who she was here to see, just motioned to the recovery room.

Cassian lay at the end of a long line of beds. He was asleep, but breathing—albeit shallowly. Bandages wrapped around his chest. Bruises covered his skin. She gingerly swept his hair back from his face and knew she was in trouble. Seeing him get shot had shaken her to the core, not knowing if he’d lived or died. One day, he might not come back. And that would break her.

She pressed her lips to his forehead. “Don’t go while I’m away.” She headed back to the hangar where the shuttle was already primed to take off.

“Ready, cap?” Kes asked when she climbed on board.

She nodded. “Let’s move out.”

#

_Present day…_

Cassian had expected more difficulty this mission. So far the only thing difficult had been watching Jyn get beaten repeatedly. It was never life-threatening—not yet anyway—but the few times he was able to see her in solitary, she had new bruises. She always smiled at him and told him she had been through worse, as if they didn’t have the mirrored burns and missing limbs that showed they’d been through worse.

The plan Cassian had worked out was simple enough. Once Jyn was out of solitary, she’d return to her cell, and then he could sneak her and Kes out to the east hangar. They’d have to wait in the shuttle for a couple hours until they launched. Thankfully, the ship was automated, so they wouldn’t have to worry about a pilot. It would head straight for Ord Mantell.

This was all assuming that Jyn didn’t get herself killed beforehand.

The moment she was out of solitary, the Trandoshan she stabbed nearly broke her arm with a tray. A friend of the Trandoshan tried to stab Jyn in the leg with a shank, but soon discovered that she didn’t have a normal prosthesis. And then there was a pair of guards who’d cornered her while she was on the machines and beat her over nothing. She had warned him about this beforehand, but seeing it was another thing. The Black Sun hated her. And they were everywhere.

By the time sleep hours came, Cassian was itching to get Jyn out of this place. His sleep was restless, going in and out until he got up. The night shift hadn’t yet gotten back, and the morning shift hadn’t yet woken up. There was an hour interim where he could get Kes and Jyn out without raising alarms.

He was careful not to wake anybody else while he dressed and headed into the cell block. A pair of guards passed Kes’ cell just as Cassian got to the fifth level. As quickly and quietly as he could, he opened the cell and pulled Kes out. The other prisoners barely lifted their heads, probably figuring that Kes was in trouble.

“What—” Kes started.

“No talking,” Cassian whispered and hurried down the stairs before the patrol turned around. He guided Kes down to the third level, stopping every so often so a patrol could pass. Jyn was already waiting by the door when he came. She didn’t speak, didn’t question him, just followed him and Kes down to the hangar level.

“The shuttle will leave in two hours,” Cassian said. “Get comfortable.”

Kes climbed through the shuttle door and crammed between a pair of crates. Cassian followed suit. Jyn stood next to the ship, staring at something.

“What are you doing, Jyn?” Cassian asked.

She glanced back at him. “The Black Sun has been watching me closely.”

He frowned. “What are you saying?”

Alarms rang out. Cassian’s stomach sank. He was about to get out of the shuttle when Jyn came up to him and took off his helmet.

“I can get the shuttle moving now,” she said. “Just wait.”

He got the sense that something wasn’t right. “What are you going to—?”

She cradled his face in her hands and pulled him closer. His heart nearly stopped when her lips met his. He was too surprised at first to do anything, but then he leaned into her. The split in her lip tasted of blood. Somehow, he expected nothing less in a kiss from her. His hands slid into her hair, drawing her closer. She pressed into him until he was dizzy.

“I love you,” she whispered against his lips.

He didn’t have time to respond before she pushed him into Kes and jumped out of the shuttle. The door slid shut. Panic seized Cassian. He looked for a button to open the door, but there was none. A slit of a window showed Jyn going to a panel on the far wall of the hangar. The shuttle abruptly rumbled to a start. Guards flooded into the hangar just as the ship pulled out.

“Jyn!” Cassian called futilely.

Kes clasped his shoulder. “They won’t kill her, not immediately. The Black Sun like to…make them suffer…for as long as possible.”

Cassian glared at Kes. “Is that supposed to make me feel better?”

“We can come back for her, Andor.”

“No.” Cassian took a deep breath. “Not ‘we.’ You’re going straight to Hoth. You need to tell Mothma what you know, and your pregnant wife is waiting for you.”

Kes grimaced. “But—”

“But nothing. I’m not putting you at risk. I’ll get Jyn.” Cassian stared out the window at the rapidly shrinking prison. It was hard to breathe. Jyn hadn’t been in good shape when they left, and now… “She knew it would come to this.” He slammed his fist into the wall out of frustration.

“We’ll land in an hour,” Kes said evenly. “We should use that time to make a plan.”

Planning. That was something Cassian could do—badly, Jyn would argue. She was always better at coming up with plans.

He swallowed past the lump in his throat. The warmth of her was still on his lips. She’d said she loved him. The words kept repeating in his mind. She’d said them because she thought it would be her last chance. But she hadn’t even let him say it back.


	5. Chapter 5

The Black Sun had been watching her, and they saw everything in the prison. Jyn knew that as she stared at the control panel in the hangar wall. The shuttle could be manually sent off from there, but she’d have to stay behind to operate it. They had a few minutes maybe until the alarms sounded and guards overwhelmed them. Jyn had known that when Cassian told her his plan.

“What are you doing, Jyn?” Cassian asked from inside the shuttle.

She glanced back at him. “The Black Sun has been watching me closely.”

“What are you saying?”

The alarms blared, echoing off the hangar walls. Kes cursed under his breath. Cassian moved to get out of the shuttle, so Jyn hurried to him. She took off his helmet, just to see his face one last time.

“I can get the shuttle moving now,” she said. “Just wait.”

He searched her eyes. “What are you going to—?”

She took his face in her hands and pulled him to her. Fire ran through her when their lips pressed together. He tensed in surprise, but then leaned into her, kissing back wholeheartedly. When his fingers caught in her hair, she wished she’d done this sooner. But it was too late for them now.

“I love you,” she whispered, needing to say it before she gave her life for him.

He didn’t have the chance to go after her. She pushed him back, got out of the shuttle, and closed the door behind her. The guards’ footsteps grew louder. She ignored Cassian’s calls through the door and ran to the control panel. The prison hadn’t changed it since she was last here. She input the order to start the shuttle. The engines rumbled.

Guards poured into the hangar. She ripped the transmitter from the panel, so they couldn’t input new orders. The shuttle flew out. Jyn watched it go off into the darkness until the guards swarmed her. She didn’t resist when they wrestled her arms behind her and dragged her out of the hangar. Kes and Cassian were safe. That’s all that mattered.

They took her to solitary and beat the shit out of her. They probably wouldn’t kill her for another day or two—draw out her suffering as long as possible. It wasn’t enough time for a rescue mission. They’d know Cassian wasn’t a guard now. He had no way back in, and the Alliance didn’t have the resources to launch a full-scale attack—not that they would for one captain. She was going to die here. At least she’d gotten to tell Cassian how she felt, after all this time.

She hoped he wouldn’t come after her.

#

_2 months ago…_

He woke to restless shifting at his back. Her hand blindly reached out and grabbed the edge of his shirt. A shuttering breath followed. Cassian turned over to see tears streaming from Jyn’s eyes. Her hair was damp with sweat and splayed wildly over her pillow from her shifting.

“Jyn,” he whispered and took her hand. “Jyn, wake up.”

Her eyes snapped open. For a moment, she stared at something long past, but then the present slowly bled into her gaze. His prosthetic hand squeezed hers. She reached up to trace the faint lines on the left side of his face, leftover from the radiation burns, as if reminding herself that the scars showed they’d lived.

“You were crying,” he said softly and wiped the moisture from her cheeks. “What were you dreaming about?”

She took a deep breath before answering. “When I left you at the bottom of the data storage column on Scarif.”

His eyes were soft. “You had to.”

“I know, but I still left you.” She sighed and pulled his hand up to look at the system of metal and plastics that now made his arm, further evidence that he’d lived.

“You want to try sleeping again?” he asked, concern coloring his voice. “You don’t have to leave for another three hours.”

She didn’t answer immediately, as if considering the viability of sleeping again, but then nodded. “All right.”

He lay on his side of her bed. What an odd thing. He had a side of her bed, but he wasn’t hers. The space between them was inches since her bed was really only made for one. Yet that bit of distance felt like miles.

Weight shifted on the mattress, pulling him from his thoughts of their unusual relationship. Her hand closed around his shoulder. It pulled him back. He turned around to face her.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

She shook her head and turned, so her back was pressed against him. He was too surprised to resist when she pulled his arm over her waist. They’d slept in each other’s beds many times before under the pretense of fending off the nightmares because it did help to have each other right there, but they always slept with their backs to each other, never quite touching. This was different.

“Don’t,” she whispered before he said anything. “Please.”

He didn’t need to ask for clarification. Her prosthesis brushed his leg when he shifted to settle comfortably against her. He pulled her closer and closed his eyes.

Three hours later, he woke again to her lips on his forehead. “Leaving?” he mumbled, voice thick with sleep.

She nodded. Her right eye glimmered as she stared down at him. “I am.”

“How long?”

“Three weeks.”

That was a long time, and he’d be on assignment by then. They might not see each other for another month or two. His chest ached.

“My father used to say the things worth dying for are worth living for, too,” she murmured abruptly.

He got the sense she was making a promise to return alive. “Very true.”

She hadn’t tied her hair back, letting it hang around her face. Without thinking, he smoothed it back. His fingers lingered by her cheek. She dropped her gaze to his lips, and his heart raced away. But he took his hand back. And she stood from the bed.

The heaviness of all the things unsaid between them was suffocating. He watched her pull her hair back into a tie and pick up her duffel from the floor.

“Goodbye, Cassian,” she whispered before heading out the door.

He sighed into the bed. Her warmth still lingered in the sheets.

#

_Present day…_

After Cassian sent Kes on his way to Hoth, Mothma ordered him back. He politely refused and explained that he wasn’t going to leave Jyn behind. Mothma’s only response was to wish him luck and tell him he shouldn’t speak with her again until he got Captain Erso back, lest Rieekan overhear Cassian had disobeyed a direct order. Cassian would probably never call Mothma. The odds were not in his favor. He had to figure out a way to get in, find Jyn, and then get out—assuming she was still alive when he got there. Thankfully, Jyn wasn’t the only one with contacts on Ord Mantell.

It took him three calls to get a bag of explosives. It took two more calls to find out that the next shipment to Hederat would leave Worlport in two hours. He spent one of those hours breaking into the shipment facility, disguised as a janitor. Getting into the flight records was harder. He had to knock out three people in the control room just to access the terminal. The second hour consisted of stealing a pilot uniform and sneaking into the cargo hold on the shuttle

The shipment was mostly nutrient paste for the prisoners, but there was also raw material for the machine shop. Cassian sat on a crate of paste and thought of his next step. Jyn had been on the station for seven hours at this point. It would be near lunch, not an ideal time to perform a rescue mission, but he wasn’t going to wait another second while she was at the hands of the Black Sun. They’d probably stashed her in solitary. He’d need to get into the control room to get her exact whereabouts. The explosives would help with that…hopefully.

The shuttle landed, and a guard slid open the cargo doors. Prisoners on the packing and supply team hurried in to unpack crates. Cassian kept his head down, slung his bag of explosives over his shoulder, and calmly walked out of the shuttle. The guards and prisoners didn’t pay him much mind while he made his way out of the hangar. There was a refresher on the way to the cell block that Cassian stopped in to change into a guard uniform. He threw away the pilot’s uniform before heading out.

Lunch wouldn’t be for another forty-five minutes, meaning the prisoner’s cafeteria would be empty. Cassian was relieved to find that fact held true when he walked in. He set bombs on either side of the room, enough to cause a commotion but not destroy the prison. Probably. His options were limited at this point.

The guards didn’t stop Cassian as he hurried away. No one stopped a colleague who walked like they had a purpose. The bombs went off just before Cassian reached for the control room door panel. The blast knocked him forward, and the sound made his ears ring for a moment. When the ringing faded, alarms blared, echoing off the concrete walls. Guards hurried toward the cafeteria. The control room door clicked open. In an emergency, all the doors in the prison unlocked.

The droids in the control room turned when Cassian stepped in. He took the blaster from his bag and shot them all before they could question his presence. Through the window, prisoners in the machine shop hurried to the nearest exit. Guards struggled to keep order. They’d be too preoccupied with them to worry about much else.

Cassian hurried to a console and looked through the prison assignments. Lyra Rallik was last in solitary confinement, cell 2-523, but over her name in her record, in bright red letters, was DECEASED. Cassian’s chest constricted. It was entirely possible that they had lied, so they could do whatever they liked with her. The Black Sun liked to make their victims suffer.

Cassian took a deep breath and hurried out.

#

Jyn’s blood covered the walls and floor. Two guards had her arms pinned to the wall. The third punched her in the gut. She gasped and coughed, choking on her own blood and air. The next punch struck her face. Her teeth cut the inside of her cheek. She spit out more blood.

They kept beating her. She started losing consciousness after a few minutes—from blood loss or fatigue, she didn’t know. They threw her to the floor when her vision became spotty. She hit the concrete with a groan.

“We’ll be back later, Rallik,” a guard said before they left.

She lay on the floor, in too much pain to move. They’d kill her soon, maybe not on purpose, but soon nonetheless. Her thoughts strayed to Cassian, which just hurt her more. Maybe she was a masochist, but she couldn’t get his face out of her mind, the way he looked at her when he realized she wasn’t coming with him. That wasn’t how she imagined leaving him. They were supposed to die on opposite sides of the galaxy, fighting the good fight with the Rebellion. But it was a good way to die, giving her life for his and Kes. Maybe Kes would name his kid after her.

She didn’t know when she passed out, but the floor shaking woke her up. Not an earthquake since they weren’t on land. Bombs? Who would set off bombs in a concrete space station?

“Oh, kriff,” she groaned. “He still doesn’t know how to plan.”

Alarms blared. She painfully got to her feet. Her ribs were definitely broken. They hurt with every breath and movement, so she leaned against the wall to stay upright.

Her door abruptly slid open, probably an emergency protocol. All the other cells opened, and prisoners came flooding out. If Cassian really was responsible for this, he was probably at the control room on the other side of the prison. She staggered through the hall, using the wall to prop her up. Prisoners ran past her, nearly knocking her over multiple times, and the floor kept moving. Or maybe she had lost too much blood. Maybe both.

Someone grabbed her from behind. Despite her injuries, she flailed until she could land a kick to the guy’s thigh. He dropped her with a grunt. She spun around to punch him, but he caught her wrist…with a metal hand.

“Could you not hurt your savior?” Cassian asked.

Her vision swam with tears that she refused to let fall. She slapped his shoulder. “You idiot! Why did you come back for me?”

Red light whizzed by her head. He pulled her forward, making her ribs scream, but now wasn’t the time to complain. Blasters fired on them from behind. Other prisoners ducked away, letting them get a path downstairs.

“Please tell me you have a plan to get out of here,” Jyn muttered as they descended.

Cassian was silent for much too long. “I didn’t get that far.”

If she hadn’t been struggling to breathe, she would have told him exactly what she thought of that answer, but as it was, he was half-carrying her through the halls. The outbound shipment already went with Cassian and Kes. The only other shuttle here was the supply ship that Cassian doubtlessly came on. There were also the escape pods, but they’d be overwhelmed because Cassian decided to set off kriffing bombs.

“The shuttle,” Jyn huffed, struggling to move her feet. “The shuttle is our best bet.”

Cassian got them down to the hangar level. It was packed with prisoners, which Jyn thought would be a problem, but it actually gave them anonymity. Their pursuers couldn’t come after them when they disappeared into a mass of bodies. Cassian lifted his blaster and threatened people with it to get them to move out of the way. Jyn kept up with him as best she could, but she was slow from her injuries. He ultimately pulled her onto his back and carried her to the hangar door.

“It’s locked,” Cassian said when he tried the panel.

“Observe that yourself?” a prisoner grumbled behind him.

Jyn sighed and pushed herself off Cassian’s back. “This is why you’re not allowed to plan anything.” She took his blaster and shot off the front panel. It took her only a few seconds to get the wiring right. The door slid open.

Prisoners came rushing forward. Cassian pulled Jyn onto his back and ran into the hangar. Guards were there already preparing the shuttle to take off. Cassian ducked behind a crate when they opened fire on him and the prisoners. Jyn crawled off him and looked around for something to help them.

The shuttle was pilot-operated, so they’d need to get inside the ship if they wanted to leave. The prisoners were drawing all of the guards’ fire, forcing them to one side. If Cassian and Jyn were stealthy, they could sneak in from the other side, but Jyn wasn’t exactly in the best form for stealth.

“Cassian,” she whispered.

His face wasn’t visible through his helmet, but she sensed he was looking at her. “What is it?”

She peered over the crate and pointed to the left side of the shuttle. “You can sneak over while I cover you.”

“Are you trying to die?” He shook his head. “I didn’t come all this way to leave you again.”

“And I didn’t get you out, so you could come back and die for me!” she snapped.

He pulled her to her feet with him. “Run.”

She didn’t have room to argue now that they were out in the open. Her jaw clenched, and she ran for the shuttle as best she could. He provided cover fire, drawing their attention to him instead of her. She collapsed just behind the shuttle, away from the shots. Her ribs and lungs burned, and black spots dotted her vision. She turned in time to see a blast catch Cassian in his shoulder. He went down. His prosthesis hung limp, useless now that it had been damaged.

She crawled to him and grabbed his blaster from his deactivated hand. He got to his feet while she fired back at the guards that tried to come after them. One shot caught a guard in the leg, the other in the chest. Cassian took her arm and dragged her behind the cover of the shuttle. Jyn’s blood streaked across the ship’s side where she used her hand to hold herself up. Cassian clutched his shoulder. A mix of hydraulic fluid and blood dripped down his prosthesis.

They pulled open the door to the helm. A pilot sat in the seat, dead from a shot through his temple. The guards must have shot him to stop him from leaving without them. Cassian pulled him out and pushed Jyn in. She crawled over to the co-pilot’s chair, grunting in pain as she went. Streaks of red light flew past Cassian while he climbed in using just his left arm. The shots narrowly missed him.

By the time he started the engine, Jyn was halfway through plotting a jump. “Do you know how to fly this tub?” she asked.

“We’ll see.” He punched it. The shuttle zipped out of the hangar, the force of it compressing Jyn’s broken ribs. She didn’t mind the pain so much now.

“Ready to jump whenever you are,” she said when the course finished on her console.

He launched them into hyperspace. The light of the stars flying past filled the glass in front of them. Jyn leaned back in her seat and let out a breath she hadn’t known she’d been holding. Her heart pounded in her chest. They’d done it.

“You came back for me,” she mumbled.

He pulled his helmet off with a sigh. “Yes.”

Her jaw clenched. “That was a stupid thing to do. You could have died.”

“Well, you definitely would have died if I did nothing.” He narrowed his eyes at her. “Did you want me to leave you back there?”

“I wanted you to live!” Her eyes burned. “But you came back with kriffing bombs and a half-cocked plan and—” Her voice broke, and she had to take a moment to breathe. “I’m not doing this right now.” She got to her feet, albeit unsteadily, and headed into the back to look for a medical kit.

He stood and caught her wrist, making her hiss in pain at the tug on her shoulder. He let go immediately. “Sorry, but you shouldn’t be up.”

“Neither should you.” She glanced at his bleeding shoulder. “That needs to be dealt with.”

“I still have most of my blood, and I can walk.” He gently pulled her back to her chair and went hunting for a medical kit. She stared out the window, trying to keep her eyes open. Passing out sounded nice right about now.

A minute later, Cassian came back with a red box, which Jyn immediately took from him. “Sit down,” she said. “You’re bleeding everywhere.”

He obediently took a seat and let her pry his shirt back to look at the wound. The shot had torn through most of the motor circuitry in his prosthesis. The bleeding was superficial, surprisingly. Most of the liquid pouring out was hydraulic fluid. She found the leak and closed it off with a pair of tongs from the med kit. He tried not to fidget, but failed.

“Your hydraulic fluid is mostly water,” she said, “so it shouldn’t cause any problems after—” she squirt half a tube of bacta gel into the wound, making him grunt in pain— “that.”

He took deep breaths while she wrapped bandages around his shoulder. “Thanks for the warning.”

“Anytime.”

He plucked the bandages from her hand when she was done. “Your turn.”

She shook her head. “I can do it myself.”

“Let me see, Jyn.” He took out a fresh tube of bacta.

Her lips pressed together. “It’s fine, Cassian.”

“It’s not. You were barely holding up back there. I know you can’t apply this yourself.” When she didn’t move, he gave her that look he got when he knew she was lying, a kind of sharpness to his eyes and tightness in his jaw. “Jyn.”

She sighed and unzipped her jumpsuit. The horror on his face when he saw the expanse of bruises across her stomach and chest made her gut twist. “It looks worse than it is, Cassian.”

He gently ran his fingers over a purple splotch along her side. When she flinched, he snatched his hand back. “Sorry.” His eyes scanned her form before he squeezed the gel into his hand and careful spread it over the worst of the bruises. She swallowed the whimpers that wanted to escape her. Bacta would keep her going until Hoth, but it did little for the pain. He was impossibly gentle in running the gel down her back where she’d never be able to reach in her state. They ran out before he could get to her legs or arms.

“You knew it would come to this,” he mumbled when he set the med kit down, “and you still…” He shook his head.

Jyn zipped up her jumpsuit. “Kes had to go. Shara’s pregnant.”

“I know, but I could have stayed.” He held her eyes. “I could have stayed and protected you.”

“You would have gotten caught in the cross-fire, Cassian. You know that.” She averted her gaze. There was no shame in her. She didn’t regret what she’d done, but when he looked at her like that, like he was watching her disappear in front of him, it was too painful.

He stood to hover over her. “It should have been my choice, Jyn.”

She grimaced. “Dying isn’t a choice.”

The chair creaked from how hard he squeezed the top of it. “Well, you chose it easy enough!”

“You’re right. It was easy.” She glared up at him. “You and Kes got to live. That’s worth dying for.”

His eyes burned with anger and pain and fear in equal measure. “Was I not worth living for?”

She blinked. “What?”

“All the time we’ve spent together, there was a line we never crossed, and then right before you decided to sacrifice yourself, you crossed that line. So I might be worth dying for to you, but am I not worth living for?”

She saw it then, what she’d been avoiding all this time—that light in his eyes as bright as the stars, a light he only got when he looked at her. “We’re soldiers, Cassian, and hunted.” Her throat was tight, but she kept pushing the words out. “We got the plans to destroy the Death Star. The Empire is never going to stop hunting us.”

He shook his head, lips pressed to a line. “Are they going to take away our happiness, too?”

Her brows lowered. “You and I both know we’re never leaving the Rebellion. We’re not Shara and Kes. All we know is war. There is no little farm on a remote planet in our future. The Empire is going to catch up with us one day, and what if they use me to get to you? You couldn’t even leave me at a prison. What’s to stop them from using me to hurt you?”

His gaze softened. “Do you mean to say they couldn’t already?” When she didn’t answer, he took her hand. “Like you said, I couldn’t leave you in prison. I wouldn’t leave you to the Empire. Wouldn’t you do the same for me?”

“That’s not fair, Cassian. You know I would.” Dizziness threatened to overtake her, but she tried to focus on his face to keep herself grounded.

He scoffed with a bitter smile. “Not fair? What’s not fair is sacrificing yourself and making me powerless to stop you. Not fair was telling me you love me without giving me a chance to say it back.”

Her heart skipped a beat. “Cassian, I—”

He leaned down, so their faces were inches apart. “We’re already at the point of no return, Jyn. We crossed that line long ago, and you know it.”

She searched his eyes for a hint of doubt, but there was just that tireless resolve and conviction of his. “You’re right,” she admitted softly, “but this will just drag us deeper into it. It’ll hurt more if one of us doesn’t come back.”

“So be it.” He pressed his forehead to hers. “If you tell me never to talk about this again, I will. But what do you want, Jyn? What do you _really_ want?”

She closed her eyes and took a breath. It would have been so much easier to tell him to drop it—and he would, if she asked. But that wasn’t what she really wanted. It never had been. “You.” Her voice was barely above a whisper. “I want you.”

He let out a shaky breath. “That’s good to hear.”

“Is it?” She opened her eyes. “We’re still Captain Erso and Captain Andor. There will still be weeks or months apart from each other, fighting on opposite ends of the galaxy, never knowing if we’re going to make it back home. What kind of a life is that?”

“I don’t know, but I want you in it.” He cupped her cheek. “I love you.”

He’d only said those words to her in dreams. Hearing it from his lips made warmth spread through her that she hadn’t known she could feel anymore. Death and war had made her cold and numb. And then he’d barged into her life, made her look up at those Imperial flags, and reminded her that there was hope left in her.

She couldn’t keep her eyes open any longer, so she clutched to him and tried to hold onto consciousness. His lips pressed to her forehead before he carefully pushed her back into her chair. It steadily reclined.

“We’ll figure this out,” he said, voice barely above a whisper. “You should rest for now.”

She mustered the strength to mumble, “You’re worth living for.”

He was quiet for a moment, then: “Thank you, Jyn.”

And then she blacked out.


	6. Chapter 6

“—against Mothma’s decision. She knows I need you here, and she’s going to make sure you stay. Let her handle Rieekan.”

“I just don’t like sitting idle.”

Jyn’s throat felt raw when she muttered, “I’ll kick your ass if you don’t sit it down, Kes.” She opened her eyes slowly to see Shara and Kes standing over her. “Why are you both here?”

Kes cracked a smile. “Good to see you, too, cap.”

“You’re full of it.” She started to get up, but her ribs promptly stopped that idea. She hissed and leaned back into the bed.

“Easy, Jyn,” Shara said. “You have four broken ribs and some pretty severe abdominal bruising. You’re lucky there wasn’t any internal bleeding.”

“Hear that, Kes? I nearly died for your sorry ass.” She tried again to sit up. He helped her this time, stealing pillows from empty beds nearby to support her back. They appeared to be in the med bay on Hoth. There weren’t many other patients at the moment, just a few dotting the beds lining the walls. The white space was hard on Jyn’s left eye. Her prosthetic one automatically adjusted without issue.

Shara took Jyn’s hand. “Thank you, Jyn, for bringing Kes back to me.”

Jyn tried to chuckle, but it didn’t quite work, coming out more as a huff than anything. “I get to name your kid now.”

“You’re not—” Kes started.

“What names did you have in mind?” Shara asked without a hint of irony.

Jyn paused a moment, not expecting to be taken seriously. “You really would let me name your child?”

“You saved Kes.” She offered a wry smile. “I’ll at least listen to what you suggest.”

Jyn glanced at Kes who just shrugged in response. So she had to think fast. “How about Hael, if it’s a girl, and Poe, if it’s a boy?”

Shara’s brows rose. “Those…are good names.”

“You sound surprised,” Jyn muttered with narrowed eyes.

“How’d you choose them?” Kes asked, also sounding surprised.

Jyn elected to ignore that they thought she couldn’t pick out good names. “My parents wanted to have a second child, but thought it was too risky with the Empire after us. I heard them talking one night about baby names. They decided on Hael and Poe. I figure someone should use the names.”

Shara glanced down at her belly and smoothed her hand over it. She wasn’t showing yet, but Jyn suspected she would soon. “Poe,” Shara mumbled, as if trying the name on her lips. “I like it.”

Jyn smiled. “It’s a boy then?”

Shara worried her lip a moment. “It’s too early to tell, but I just have…a feeling.”

Jyn glanced at Shara’s belly. “I think you’re right.” She didn’t know how she knew it would be a boy, but she…knew.

Kes wrapped his arms around Shara’s waist and kissed her cheek. “Do you really like ‘Poe’?”

“I do. It’s a good name.” Shara leaned into him. “Do you not think it’s a good name?”

He sighed and buried his face in her neck. “If I admit I do, then my captain is going to end up naming our son. And she’ll never let me forget it.”

Jyn rolled her eyes. “It was just a suggestion, Kes. Take it or leave it.” She looked around. Cassian had got them back to Hoth clearly, but he wasn’t here. She suspected why and sighed. “How long ago did Cassian leave?”

Shara and Kes exchanged a glance. “There was an emergency,” Shara said hesitantly. “As soon as Andor got his arm repaired, Mothma sent him out.”

“It’s low-risk, though,” Kes added hurriedly. “Routine intel hand-off. He’ll be back in a week.”

Jyn shook her head. “Nothing’s ever low-risk with Cassian.” She stared up at the ceiling. “How do you two do it? How are you soldiers…and married?”

Shara’s gaze was soft and sympathetic. “It takes work. We both know the risks. There’s always a chance that the next mission we go on will be our last, but that’s just life. No one knows what tomorrow brings. We just enjoy the time we do have together.”

Kes pressed his forehead to her temple. “It isn’t easy, Jyn, but it’s worth it. I think you know that already, though.”

“Yeah,” Jyn mumbled on a sigh. “Yeah.”

Shara took a datapad from the bedside stand. “Andor left you this.” She took Kes’ hand and pulled him away. “We’re going to get food. Do you want us to bring you back anything?”

After over a week of nutrient paste, real food sounded amazing. “Whatever you can get your hands on. I miss salt.”

Shara chuckled. “Wilco.” She hurried off with Kes.

Jyn stared at the datapad in her hands a moment. It lit up when she tapped the screen, opening to a note.

_I wanted to be there when you woke up, but duty calls. We didn’t get much of a chance to talk on the way back from Hederat. I think it’s important we do. Mothma promised me some leave time when I get back, so I was thinking we could go to Lahn, away from all the ice, just the two of us._

_I’ll see you soon. I promise._

_Yours,_

_Cassian_

Jyn couldn’t help smiling…like an idiot. She hadn’t felt this way in years, hadn’t let herself feel this way. And one day, it could turn on her. She was all too familiar with how it felt to sit there, waiting for someone who wouldn’t come back, but that was a risk worth taking. That was being alive.

“Good to see you’re awake.”

Jyn looked up just as Mothma stopped at the foot of her bed. “Chancellor,” she greeted. “It’s good to see you again.”

Mothma smiled tightly. “You had me worried that I wouldn’t be able to say the same. It was brave of you, giving yourself up for Dameron and Andor.”

“Just doing my duty, ma’am.”

“I think it meant more than that, Erso. I’m not blind. I know you and Andor are…close.” When heat touched Jyn’s cheeks, Mothma gave a real smile. “I don’t make it a practice to involve myself in people’s personal lives, but you and Andor are two of my best. Given yours and his actions during this past mission, I wanted to speak with you about the future.”

Jyn’s brows pressed together. “How do you mean?”

Mothma held Jyn’s eyes. “I need to know that if it came down to Andor or the greater good that you’d choose the greater good.”

That was something Jyn hadn’t considered, but it didn’t worry her. She and Cassian had done terrible things for the cause—Cassian more so. Jyn tried to maintain her ethics and make him question bad orders, but sometimes the mission had to come first because hundreds of lives depended on its success. Sometimes Jyn had to make the hard calls. And that was why Mothma relied on her and Cassian so much. They were willing to do whatever it took for the greater good. That resolve had gotten them to Scarif. It had given Jyn the strength to get the Death Star plans to the transmitter after Cassian fell from the data storage pillar. They made the hard calls, so no one else had to. Jyn trusted they would do that for each other if necessary.

“You don’t need to worry about that, Chancellor,” Jyn said without hesitation. “Cassian and I knew what we signed up for. We know the risks…and sacrifices.”

Mothma searched Jyn’s eyes a moment longer before nodding. “You two really are quite the pair.” She inclined her head. “Thank you for your time, Erso. I hope you recover swiftly.”

“Thank you, ma’am.” Jyn watched Mothma leave, pondering what they’d talked about. A year ago, Cassian had disobeyed an order to kill Jyn’s father, and he questioned his orders more ever since. A year ago, Jyn had thought she could avoid the terrible things she’d done for the Rebellion before she left it. She knew better after Scarif. Sometimes doing the right thing meant sacrifice. Good men died down there, so the Death Star could be destroyed. She’d lost her leg and eye for that. She’d nearly lost Cassian for it, too.

_I’ll see you soon. I promise_.

Jyn stared at the words a long moment. _Soon_ was relative, but she trusted him to come back. They didn’t make promises lightly.

#

Cassian could barely keep his eyes open. The hand-off had been uneventful, but he’d rushed through delivering it to finish two days early. He stepped—or staggered—out of his ship and was immediately greeted by the sight of Leia and Han yelling at each other. Luke watched them from where he was perched on his X-wing, munching on an apple. Jyn stood by the starfighter, scowling at the Leia and Han. She had healed well while Cassian had been gone. The bruises were mostly gone from her face, and she didn’t hunch over from pain. Her back was straight as ever, letting her stand tall.

“Is that all you have to say to me?” Leia snapped. “You could have gotten us killed!”

Han rolled his eyes. “Well, you look pretty alive to me, princess.”

“You insufferable, pigheaded—”

“Okay, that’s enough!” Jyn interrupted, using the voice she reserved only when she was being a captain. She inserted herself between Leia and Han. “You’re both acting like children!”

Han folded his arms over his chest. “I’m not the one yelling.”

Before Leia could retort, Jyn grabbed his collar. “Keep talking, Solo, and I’ll have you scrubbing every damn ‘fresher on this icy hellscape.”

Cassian leaned against the wall of his ship and watched with an amused smile as Han bent his head. Jyn never needed Cassian’s help with Leia or Han. If anything, Leia and Han needed help with Jyn. But where was the fun in that?

“Better do what she says, Solo,” Cassian called out. “I saw her kick a wampa in the head once.”

Jyn stiffened when she heard him and slowly turned to meet his eyes. When he smiled, she returned it.

“That didn’t really happen,” Leia muttered.

Luke bit into his apple. “Oh, it really did. I saw it, too. She was picking its teeth out of her prosthesis weeks later.”

“Don’t talk with your mouth full, Skywalker,” Jyn chided, earning a wry grin full of apple.

Cassian folded his arms over his chest. “Organa, didn’t you promise me you’d stop raising your voice in work spaces?”

Leia averted her eyes. “Yes.” She virtually spat the word.

Jyn sighed and stepped back from them. “Just get out of here. You three are making my stitches itch.”

They didn’t move to leave, but Jyn headed over to Cassian. He stood from the wall before her arms wrapped around him.

“Aren’t there rules about hugging someone with broken ribs?” he asked and gingerly held her. “You’ve only been healing for a couple days, Jyn.”

She took a breath that wasn’t quite deep enough to be a full one. “I’m fine.”

He kissed the top of her head. “Whatever you say.”

“I do say.” She leaned back to look up at him. “You look like hell.”

His brows rose. “It’s nice to see you, too.”

She chuckled, and the sound made the exhaustion from the last five days vanish. “You’re back early.”

“I am.” He brushed his fingertips over the fading bruise on her cheek. “I had to make sure you didn’t miss me too long.”

“Oh, shut up.” She stood on her toes and pulled him down by his lapels to kiss him. The taste of caf lingered on her lips. It mixed with the scent of oil and resin clinging to her jacket. And he melted into her.

“Welcome home,” she breathed when they pulled apart.

He rested his hands on her hips. “I actually rushed to come back early because I missed you.”

Her smile was small, but it made her eyes brighter. “I know.”

“Get a room!” Luke called across the hangar, inciting jeers from the rebels around them.

Jyn shot Luke a glare without any real malice before pulling Cassian out of the hangar. They headed for the barracks, hands clasped between them. The people they passed gave them knowing or curious looks, but didn’t comment.

“You really do look tired,” Jyn said when they got close to Cassian’s room. “You didn’t sleep much while you were out, did you?”

He shook his head. “I wanted to—”

“You don’t need to explain yourself.” She came to a stop in front of his door. “Just don’t do it again. Your well-being is more important than speed.”

“Yes, ma’am.” He input his code into the panel, and the door slid open.

His room was sparsely furnished. There was just a bed, a weapons rack, and a closet. He had given up trying to hold onto much when he was constantly on the move. Jyn’s room looked much the same, but her selection of knives was a bit more extensive. Blue carpet covered the floor, worn down to the underlying concrete in some spots. The walls were flat and gray.

The door closed behind them when they stepped inside. Jyn sat on the bed and took her shoes off. “You should hit the ‘fresher,” she said. “That’s my not-so-subtle way of saying you stink.”

He chuckled and went to his closet. “Point taken.” He pulled out a change of clothes. A sonic actually sounded good—that and a bath…also sleep. Sleep sounded really good.

Jyn had her fingers in her prosthesis when he turned around. She was focused on whatever she was doing to her knee and didn’t look up when he left for the refresher. There were only a couple guys in the communal sonics. They didn’t talk while they got clean. Cassian kept thinking about Jyn in his room. It certainly wasn’t the first time she’d been in his room, but it was different now. She wasn’t just a friend he drank and talked with late at night between missions, or just a friend who sometimes slept next to him to quiet the nightmares. Well, she’d never been _just_ anything with him. Nothing would happen today. Even if he wasn’t thoroughly exhausted, her ribs were still healing. But she was in his room, and that was…different.

When he came back, she was stretched out on his bed, looking like she belonged there. She read something on her datapad. Her eyes didn’t leave it when she said, “You smell better.”

He stuffed his dirty clothes in a shoot that came out of the wall before lying next to her. “What are you reading?”

“Reports. Turns out the intel Kes had was about an Imperial officer who defected. She wanted to give us info about a base on Haidoral Prime in exchange for protection from the Empire. Kes got in the middle of a Black Sun smuggling operation before he could get to her, which is why he was at Hederat. Mothma made the deal with the defector after Kes told her, so now my team is going to launch a strike on the base next week. I can’t go with them obviously, but I’ve been directing them to make sure they have their best shot at succeeding. That means analyzing the data and coming up with a plan.” She glanced at him sidelong. “Something I’m not sure you’re familiar with.”

“Oh, is that right?” He plucked the datapad from her hands. “I got you out of Hederat, didn’t I?”

“Barely.” She snaked her arm over his waist. “You set off bombs in a space station.”

He dropped his head to her shoulder. “I only blew it up a little.”

“Uh-huh.” She didn’t sound convinced.

“Who’s leading the strike team if you’re out of commission?” The Pathfinders were a special forces group, and their chain of command worked differently than the rest of infantry. Jyn happened to lead a covert ops strike team, which frustrated Cassian to no end because his Intelligence resources couldn’t always check in on her when almost everything she did was classified.

She had a slow smile. “My sergeant, Kirin. And Solo doesn’t know it yet, but I requested he fill in for Kes on this mission. I think helping to lead a team will get him to see that he can’t do everything by himself anymore.”

Cassian’s brows climbed his forehead. “Rieekan’s going to have opinions about that.”

“Well, his options are limited since the other captains are on assignment at the moment. Kirin’s never been on a mission without me and Kes either, so he needs all the help he can get. Also, Organa and Skywalker will probably want to step up if Han’s on the team. Those three are inseparable.” Jyn took back her datapad and flipped through a set of blueprints until Cassian placed his hand over hers.

“Can we stop working for a moment?” he requested.

She set her datapad on the floor beside the bed. “We can.” She turned onto her side, so she faced him. “What’s on your mind?”

“You, mostly.” When pink touched her cheeks, he smiled. “You kind of passed out in the middle of our conversation about…us.”

“To be fair, I had four broken ribs and mild head trauma.” Her eyes swept over his face. “But we should talk about us.”

Delayed nervousness twisted in Cassian’s gut. “You know what I want, but I don’t know if it’s what you want.”

Her eyes saw straight into him, as they always did. “I didn’t kiss you earlier for nothing. This isn’t going to be easy, by virtue of who we are and what we do, but I want to try. It isn’t enough for me to just be your friend. I don’t think I have been just a friend for a long time anyway.”

Relief and joy rushed through Cassian in equal measure. He turned his smile into her shoulder. “No, you haven’t.”

“So where do we go from here?” Her breath brushed his cheek.

“I think we’ll continue doing what we have been.” He stretched his arm over her hips, mindful of her ribs, and pulled her closer. “But I get to call you mine now.”

She beamed. “Only if you allow me to do the same.”

“For as long as you’ll have me.”

She rested her hand on his cheek, thumb moving back and forth over his skin absently. “I love you.”

For as long as he lived, he’d never tire of hearing her say that. “I love you, too.”

“I’m sorry it took me so long to say it.”

“You beat me.” He turned his lips into her palm. “We can make the most of the time we have from now on.”

She pressed her forehead to his, and he craned his neck to catch her lips. The kiss was brief, but left Cassian feeling warm and comfortable. He belonged right here, beside her. Home was never a place. It was her.

She dropped her hand to his shoulder. “You should sleep. I know you’re exhausted.”

“Wake me up if you have to leave,” he said out of habit. Sometimes they had to go in the middle of the night on assignment, so it became ritual to say goodbye before they went. That way neither of them ever woke up wondering where the other had gone. They always knew, and they always got a chance to say goodbye, possibly for the last time.

“I’m not going anywhere, Cassian,” she whispered into his temple. “I promise.”


	7. Epilogue (Kinda)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From Finn's perspective...

_33 years later…_

D’Qar wasn’t like the First Order. Everything was moving and hectic and not always pristine. Finn kept looking around at the old stone making up the Resistance base, the cracks in it that showed this place had been lived in and enduring. His feet felt heavy as they took him into the central command center on Poe’s heels. He had to get Rey back, and Poe said he could help.

Resistance officers filled the room, their voices bouncing off the walls. Various consoles and comm terminals dotted the space. A command console sat in the center, displaying a holo of a star system. Poe headed toward a woman who must have been in her early fifties. Most of her hair was gray and wrinkles deepened the lines of her face, but there was something in her eyes that burned with youth and passion.

“General Organa,” Poe greeted before he stopped with Finn at his side.

Organa turned away from the man she was speaking with and looked up at Poe expectantly.

“I’m sorry to interrupt,” Poe continued quickly, “but this is Finn. He needs to talk to you.”

Her head snapped around to face Finn. He must have been a full head taller than her, yet he suddenly felt very small. She held his eyes. “And I need to talk to him.” Something of a smile touched her lips. “That was incredibly brave, what you did. Renouncing the First Order, saving this man’s life—”

“Thank you, ma’am,” Finn said before she could go on acknowledging him about things he didn’t deserve to be recognized for. “But a friend of mine was taken prisoner.”

“Han told me about the girl.” Her gaze was soft, but not pitying. “I’m sorry.”

Poe thankfully stepped in. “Finn’s familiar with the weapon that destroyed the Hosnian system. He worked on the base.”

“Really?” said the man next to Organa.

Finn looked up at him and immediately felt as though he should have noticed this man’s presence much sooner. A metal hand extended out from under the man’s sleeve. He looked the general’s age, maybe a little older, with gray hair and deep wrinkles at the corners of his eyes. The left side of his face and neck wasn’t quite right. Scars marred part of his jaw and his ear.

“Ah, Finn, this is the Director of Intelligence, Cassian Andor,” Poe introduced.

Andor smiled warmly. “Poe’s told me all about you, Finn. I can’t thank you enough for bringing him back to us. We were afraid we’d lost him.”

The way he said that made Finn think there was more to the acknowledgment than. “You and Poe are friends?”

Organa scoffed. “Director Andor is Dameron’s uncle.”

“Sort of,” Poe amended. “We’re not related by blood, but he’s always been a part of the family.”

“You’ve called him Uncle Cass since you could talk,” Organa pointed out. “He’s your uncle.”

Andor waved a hand dismissively. “Never mind that. Finn, we’re desperate for anything you can tell us about Starkiller.”

Finn thought of Rey again, and his stomach sank. “That’s where my friend was taken. I’ve got to get there fast.”

“And I will do everything I can to help, but first, you need to tell us all you know.”

So he did—all of it, about Starkiller and Tuanul and leaving the First Order. Organa had him get it down in writing, so to speak. She made him sit down at a terminal and type out everything he knew about Starkiller and the First Order’s plans. By the time he was done, Poe called him to another meeting.

Officers clumped around the central console. Finn stood off to the side and let them talk it out, not quite sure about his role here yet. Han and the general seemed to be sitting back and listening. Andor stood just behind them, somehow there and not there at the same time—like a shadow. Finn suspected the Director of Intelligence was good at that. Poe stood at the head of the console. He looked tired now, like the knowledge of everything he’d just learned was bearing down on him.

“The scan data from Snap’s reconnaissance flight confirms Finn’s report,” he said, gesturing to the holo of Starkiller’s terrain.

“They’ve somehow created a hyper-lightspeed weapon built within the planet itself,” another officer explained.

“A laser cannon.” The man who’d spoken let out a heavy sigh while he stared at the evidence before him.

The other officer looked similarly troubled. “We’re not sure how to describe a weapon of this scale.”

“It’s another Death Star,” someone chimed in.

Poe shook his head. “I wish that were the case, major.” He input something into the console. “This was the Death Star.” A small holo of the Death Star replaced the terrain map, and then drifted to the side to show the massive Starkiller Base. “And this is Starkiller Base.”

Murmurs broke out among the crowd. Han, who’d been quiet the entire time, looked unimpressed.

“So it’s big,” he muttered dismissively.

“Ever the optimist,” cut in a smooth voice, and an unnatural silence fell over the room. A line of officers at the console parted when a woman stepped forward. Finn failed not to stare. Her right eye was black, no white whatsoever. A deep scar ran along the length of her jaw, and like Director Andor, one side of her face and neck wasn’t quite right. Her gray hair was braided over her shoulder, doubtlessly concealing more scars. But what unnerved Finn about her was the sharpness of her gaze, like she could see into the darkest parts of a person that they never wanted to look at themselves.

“You’re a good leader, Han,” she said evenly, “but let’s not underestimate what we’re up against. I lost over half my team, my leg, and my eye just to get the plans to destroy the first Death Star. I’d rather not repeat history.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Han grumbled.

“You’re late, colonel,” Organa said, but she didn’t sound angry.

The woman smiled. Her lips didn’t quite move up all the way on the right side. “Perhaps you just didn’t see me, general.”

Organa narrowed her eyes, but she was also smiling.

“How is it possible to power a weapon of that size?” someone asked.

Finn stepped forward, finally useful to the conversation. “It uses the power of the sun. As the weapon is charged, the sun is drained until it disappears.”

A communications officer hurried in and handed a note to Organa. She read it quickly. Her face fell. “The First Order,” she said gravely. “They’re charging the weapon again now. Our system is the next target.”

C-3PO was the first to express how they were all doomed. Han, of course, responded by asking how to blow up Starkiller, a sentiment echoed by Organa. A technician commented that there had to be a thermal oscillator at the base. When Finn confirmed there was, ideas started going. Han offered to take Finn into the base to disable the shields. The Resistance could then get to the oscillator. Poe laid out the plan, got an affirmative, and then they were off.

Finn was given a blaster by a requisition officer before he was told to head for the Falcon. He passed Poe on the way. Director Andor and the woman with the piercing stare were with Poe beside Black One.

“If you die out there,” the woman said, “I will kill you.”

Poe sighed. “I’m thirty-two years old, Aunt Jyn. I can handle myself.”

Andor clasped Poe’s shoulder. “We know you can, and we’ll still kill you if you die.”

“Your uncle didn’t track you to Jakku and then make me haul your broken ass back to D’Qar, so you could get blown up on a superweapon.” The woman’s tone was firm, but not sharp. “Always remember that you have people waiting for you. Your life belongs to them—to us. If you can die for them, you can live for them. And living is a lot harder than dying.”

Poe looked past her and caught Finn watching. “Oh, uh… Hey, Finn.”

The woman spun around and set those all-seeing eyes on Finn. “So you’re the one who saved my boy.”

“I… Yes, ma’am,” Finn mumbled lamely, unnerved by her gaze.

“Finn, this is Colonel Jyn Erso of Infantry and Covert Operations,” Poe introduced. He paused a moment before adding, “My aunt.”

“We should let Poe get a move on, Jyn,” Andor said. “We also have jobs to get back to.”

Erso took Poe’s face in her hands and kissed his forehead. “Your parents would be so proud of you, Poe.”

Andor pulled Poe into a hug. “We’ll be here when you get back, kiddo. We love you.”

“I love you guys, too,” Poe mumbled into his uncle’s shoulder.

Erso offered a kind smile when Poe stepped back. “May the Force be with you.” With that, she headed away with her husband, patting Finn on the shoulder as she passed. It was somehow the most affirming thing Finn had ever received.

Poe had an awkward smile. “My aunt and uncle always insist on saying goodbye to me before I head off. It’s because they know it could be the last time they see me. The way they act, you’d think they were my parents.”

Finn didn’t really know what it was like to have parents, but Andor and Erso had been so loving. “You’re lucky.”

Poe seemed taken off guard by the comment, his stance faltering. “I… Yeah… I guess I am.”

“I have to get to the Falcon,” Finn said with a smile. “See you on the other side.”

“Sure thing, buddy.”

Finn continued on. He spied Andor and Erso walking across the tarmac, their steps in sync and hands brushing every so often. They were in the middle of a war, and they must have been fighting this fight for over thirty years if they’d been around since the first Death Star. But here they were together, showering Poe with affection while also being two of the most intimidating people Finn had ever met—and Finn had served under Phasma. The Order thrived on repressing attachment, on caring only about the mission, but Finn felt safer knowing there were people like Erso and Andor who truly cared. Maybe that was why Poe was so generous.

“So Erso and Andor fought to destroy the first Death Star?” Finn asked Han while they prepped the ship.

Han didn’t look up from the console he was working on. “They did a lot more than that. They were in the Battle of Scarif, the Battle of Yavin, the Battle of Endor—pretty much every battle that ever mattered, they were a part of it.”

“You respect them,” Finn observed.

Han didn’t respond immediately. “Yeah, I do.” He glanced at Finn. “Stick around, kid, and I’m sure they’ll adopt you.”

Finn blinked. “Adopt me?”

“It’s kind of their thing, picking up strays and making them feel like they always got a place here.” Han headed up the ship ramp. “Let’s go. Those shields aren’t going to disable themselves.”

Finn picked up the crate from the ground and followed Han into the ship. He looked over his shoulder at the swarm of pilots running across the tarmac. Organa stood with Erso and Andor by the hangar bay. All three of them were directing fighters. Finn never had a place for himself, a place to come back to, a place where people were waiting for him. Poe was lucky to have that. Maybe Finn would be, too.


End file.
